I'm a newlywed..We just married in September. Before while we were just dating but living together with the plan of marriage he was flirting online with women, getting pics and exchanging pics of himself exposed. I found out and confronted him. He decided that was not what made him happy and that our life together was what he wanted. I recently found one short vid of him exposing himself again! Why would he do this again! What am I doing wrong? I am 5 1/2 months pregnant and under the impression our sex life is GREAT! Confused and hurt.
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You both should see a counselor. He has an addiction and if you ignore it or do not do anything about it, it can very well lead to other, more serious addictions. SEE: Pamela Paul's "Pornified" on internet porn addiction. It's a very well written book about porn in our modern day culture. I read it in grad school a few years back.
This can be sort of a floodgate effect, like he likes flirting with women online...then he likes sending them a picture of him...then, it's a picture of him naked...then, it's "planning" to meet at a motel...then, it's actually meeting there. You get the point. If you know about it and you don't do anything about it, you are encouraging this behavior by ignoring it. Do not be that woman. Demand that you two see a counselor together so that you can both work toward a successful marraige and life together. Is this an easy thing to do? NO. Is it much easier to just ignore it and hope it goes away? YES. Will it? Absolutely not. You owe it to your future child and to your relationship to do whatever it takes to make it work. Start by telling him no more online chatting and changing pictures with women and that you want to talk to a counselor together about it.
This is what you need to hear and what you need to do, but I honestly don't expect you to do it. But I've done my part. Good luck!2