I got hot... but I kind of got used to the idea that I would be ugly forever. Result is that I either don't approach or super approach. What do I do?

So after being a fat virgin till 20 I assumed I would just not be attractive to women. It was a relief actually, I just said well okay I may as well stop trying so hard now and just make myself the type of person I'd like to hang out with. I did that, lost weight, stopped caring quite so much about what people thought and developed my own style. Turns out I got hot, after fighting down an inferiority complex over years I finally believe I'm attractive and interesting. That said... I never learned how to hit on women properly with the outcome that I either don't make a move or I go all in. Haven't quite figured out that middle ground. Also it seems like every single method for hitting on women can somehow piss them off, and when I just treat them like people they just treat me the same. How do I get a girl interested in me, also I mean just me. I need to do this with out "social circle game" I'm post grad in a big city and all my friends are spread out. I can't just take her places and make her think I'm the man because I know all these people. I mean one on one, what do you do to hit on a girl?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Go up to her tell her she's beautiful introduce yourself and offer to take her out and get to know her if there is a mutual attraction. Just be interested in her. Ask her what she likes to do? What's he favorite spot to eat or hangout. I love dinner and a movie. Take her to see a movie she likes. After you get her number tex and ask how her day is going. Just be yourself. I really like to be approached with an genuine compliment. To know if you should approach a girl look her in her eyes and read her. If you get the same look back she's interested.

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What Girls Said 1

  • Be really sincere, and above all else be a gentlemen. Respect her, and just ask her out.

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What Guys Said 1

  • I'm in the same situation except I didn't get hot lol. Just focus on yourself and meet people along the way. Maybe online would be a good start too.

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