What is the harshest reason someone has rejected you?

If you've never been rejected, then give the harshest reason you've rejected someone. If you've never been rejected AND never asked anyone, tell me why then.

I've never been asked out, so I've never rejected anyone. The harshest reason a girl has rejected is due to my looks. She bluntly told me in a text I was too ugly. I'm not saying she is the only girl to reject me on my looks but she's the only girl who bluntly admitted so (women are usually less visual anyway.)

Updates:
@MaryJNE I felt bad for you and you gave a thorough explanation.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Harshest rejection: because I was black but before you gun the you can't help who you're attracted to thing "person preference" listen to the reason.

    It was an anonymous friendly chat in a school group app. We talked for about a month or two. He tried prying my identity but I wouldn't budge because I know as soon as people find out you're black the conversation is over. He gave me his number but I wanted to keep talking as friends anonymous plus I don't meet love interest online. Even if they go to my school. Gave me several invitations out "without knowing what I look like" but I declined.

    I brought up black guys one day just to gage his thoughts on black people.
    Response: I don't care for black guys and if that's who my competition is then, I'm throwing in the towel
    I told him: he should give up now
    **he was confused** like wait you like black guys, why?

    He went on saying: how much he won't bother with black people because black culture is so unattractive... etc

    I decided to drop the I'm black "bomb" before he went any further

    I told him I can tell he doesn't roam outside of his bubble often because he's a top engineering university with bunch of educated black students and still the first thing that comes to his mind is the guy on the corner from a music video

    Which is also his definition of black culture: when people who define themselves as black goes from the UK, to the Caribbean, Africa and back

    He admitted, all his friends are of one race. He lived with one black person who just happened to be a bad influence, drug dealer etc.. so that's why he thinks like that"

    Conversation was seldom afterwards, as expected but I enjoyed setting up that trap :)
    *fun social experiment*
    He wasn't white by the way.. But another minority

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    • Well this guy was obviously racist, so this is an entirely different situation.

    • A little but. Not really
      See if I would've revaled myself and he denied me for whatever reason the response would've been "personal preference"

      Since I decided to let it play out the way it did
      "No one can deny it" but in reality a lot of the so called "personal preference rejection" is really this same mentality

      Oh and his sentence starter before he went on a rant about black people the infamous "well I'm not racist but"

      Pretty sure he missed the lesson and is a lost cause but I try :)

Most Helpful Guy

  • Ha actually this was 2 days agow she told me I was to short (I'm 5'6) and I was butt ugly I don't think I'm ugly but ya I know that's not that harsh but it still hurt

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What Girls Said 13

  • I've been rejected once. I confessed my feelings for him and he simply said "ok" and walked away.

    I have also rejected many people. I don't know what's considered harsh. I've told someone their penis is too small and he didn't know how to use it (I consider sex to be very important in a relationship). I have said to someone that he looks like a monkey to me with big ears and a small face, and I said he is too short and skinny for me. I have said to someone that they were too much of a girl and a pansy (he wears pink, hello kitty socks, has awesome hair, and is very timid).

    there's more but yeah I don't know what's considered harsh, if it is.

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    • Would you walk up to a total stranger you found unattractive and tell him or her that he/she "looks like a monkey... with big ears and a small face?"

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    • Would you tell someone you loved and cared for that he or she "looks like a monkey... with big ears and a small face" in the interest of being honest and direct?

      Why would you say something to someone who asked you out that you would not say to a stranger?

    • If the stranger approached me and asked me out, and that person looked ugly to me, then I would reject them and say they aren't attracted to me. If they ask what about them don't they like, i would say they look like a monkey (if they do indeed look like a monkey). I see no reason to waste my time by approaching someone I've never met before just to tell them that they look like a monkey (because there's no reason to). If I had a cousin or brother whom I loved and cared for, I would definitely tell them they look like a monkey if they do look like one and only if they ask me how do they look, and it wouldn't bother me because I am not dating them and since they are related to me, I would love them anyway. Yes I would be direct and honest with the people I love and care about, because I think the people that I love and care about would want me to be honest with them. I would want the same from them.

  • The harshest I rejected someone? That must have been the time when I was at the music school and the student after me just confessed to me out of the blue. He ran away without giving his name and told me to give him an answer next week. So the next week I told him "You didn't tell me who you are! I don't know you at all!" It's the only thing I could have said, I mean I totally don't know him other than the fact that we're under the same violin teacher, and his class is after me and he plays Kinsey Violin Studies book 1 (I know that because I played it when I was 9.)

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    • That's the HARSHEST reason you've rejected someone?

    • Yes? I guess so. But I felt kinda sorry for him that I had to reject him that harshly but then it was his fault because I don't know him well :/

  • I had a guy tell me I was too tall, too ugly, and looked like I was a trans man.

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  • It was wayyyy back in elementary school and we were both around 9yrs old. He was my best friend at the time and basically a conversation came up where he wanted to share who he had a crush on in class. He ended up saying my cousin who was the pretty, popular girl in class. He asked me to say who I liked and told him that it was him lol So he just stared at meand said ok. That was the first and last time I ever got rejected.. lol

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  • I wrote him a letter about my feelings for him.
    I was too sweet.

    My taste in guys troubles me sometimes. He wasn't that cute now that I think about it.

    Oh lawd.

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  • My harshest rejection with men is always the same.
    "No offence dude but your not my physical type"

    When they ask the inevitable "What is then?", I DO tell them.

    ie: I see no point in lying or being nasty.

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  • My crush from junior year rejected me because I was not good looking enough and fat. So, he ended up dating my best friend who looks awesome. It made me feel completely broken to be honest.

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  • My friend was tryinh to set me up with the friend of this guy she was talking to. The guy wasn't interested in me , because of my weight. It did hurt my feelings a bit. I eventually got over it.

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    • Even as a man, I must admit we are so shallow when it comes to looks, especially about weight. I even know obese men who won't date overweight women.

  • I was said that I was unattractive

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  • My skin color. He said "you're pretty for a black girl but I don't date black girls". 😐

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    • I can see how that's harsh but I don't generally find black girls attractive myself. You can't help what you're physically attracted to.

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    • Right, and that sounds like more to me he has something against blacks.

    • Most likely. I was just baffled at why he was always flirting with me.

  • You are not my type, you study too much.

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    • How can someone reject you for working hard?

    • Because he thought that I looked too nerdy and his friends would laugh at him for dating a girl who is not rich but a simple, average A++ grader who is good for nothing but for doing homework and study.

  • Their reason... I was not white

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  • I don't know why I was since he couldnt be honest. So I guess because he was just not into me as I was.

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What Guys Said 9

  • 1. 2002 - her mom broke us up. Because I was a "creeper" for being interested in someone 3-1/2 years younger than myself.

    2. 2005 - She got a job and didn't need me anymore.

    3. 2007 - I couldn't help her with her chemistry homework. So she told lies about me to the police to add injury to insult.

    4. 2009 - Her mom hated my guts because I had a run-in with the girl's ex-mother-in-law.

    5. 2010 - Because I stood up for myself, and she didn't like her friends arguing.

    6. 2011 - Because her stepdad died, and she blamed it on me because the DoS was harassing her on account of me. Long story.

    7. 2013 - Because I invited her to a party, but calling her mom "would be too awkward." (autistic gal)

    8. 2014 - Because I wouldn't let her emotionally abuse me.

    9. 2014 - Because I got a job at the store where her mom liked to shop. And she didn't want me to meet her parents. Ever.

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  • I have been rejected many times, but never harshly. Having read the responses here, I am grateful.

    Wait a minute, there was a girl first said yes, then changed her mind, then started spreading rumors about me. Fortunately, people didn't really believe her. I guess that was the harshest.

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  • hm.. probably for being black

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  • Because I was black. Racist cunt.

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    • Well you don't know if she was racist or not. I'm not attracted to black girls myself. You can't help what you're attracted to.

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    • But what if the reason you won't date a particular race is because you don't find them physically attractive? Some people are very shallow and ONLY care about looks.

      For me, it's not the stereotypes at all-I just generally don't find black women attractive.

    • You just used the word "generally", denoting you probably have room for leeway. Try to do some traveling in your life and make genuine efforts to know people. You were taught through various methods (your peers, media outlets etc) to not find black women attractive. Everyone is brainwashed in some way. I can admit I was biased towards religious people for awhile until I educated myself. Try it out sometime. Read a book or leave your hometown for once.

  • I've been rejected for being too smart.

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  • Met this girl, started talking to her, She was a solid 8.5, as we started getting closer, she said she didn't want to date me because "You look just like my Ex"

    WTF.. I can't do anything about that? lol

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  • Probably for being Asian and short; about 5'4 to 5'5.

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  • Harshest rejection I've received: She started laughing at me then called her a bunch of her friends over and told them I asked her out and they started laughing too. A lot of my friends were also around and it was really embarrassing. I started crying because she was the first girl I ever asked out.

    Harshest rejection I've given: She told me she wanted to date me and I was making a sand castle and I said that doesn't sound very fun, her friend pulled me aside and offered me 50 bucks to go out with her to which I said it still sounds awful, and when she kept trying I literally got up and ran into the woods to get away from her.

    Both of these were in my early teens.

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  • One of my girlfriends dumped me when I found out I had cancer.

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