Should I sleep with other girls?

I met this girl last week, and yesterday we went on a date. I told her from the beginning that I'm not looking for a relationship, if it happens, it happens, but I'm more interested in just a friendship, and sex. I told her twice, so she knows, and she told me she actually wants a relationship more than just sex.
The problem is that we hit it off perfectly, I haven't connected with someone so good in years, and we ended up making out for half an hour at the park too.

My situation is that I don't know what to do, I don't know if I should sleep with other girls too, I mean, I told her what I wanted, and I told myself that I wasn't gonna get in a relationship right now.
I'm kinda confused, 'cause one part of me tells me to stick with her, but the other part tells me to don't get serious.
Please, any advice is more than welcomed.

Updates:
F*ck, I forgot the "I" in the title xD

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Most Helpful Girl

  • It's not a matter of 'should' you... You made it clear you're not looking to start a relationship or anything like that with that girl, so I think you're fine from that stand-point. Regardless, that doesn't mean you have to act on it by sleeping with someone else.
    Especially since you really like this girl, so much that you're starting to think that maybe you always want a relationship with her from what it sounds like. See your guys' lines of communication are open and you were clear with what you're interested in, I don't see why you shouldn't just stay exclusive with her at the moment. That includes having sex with her, if anyone at all, cause she may be later bothered that you slept with someone else should things come teo you guys starting a relationship.

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    • So you say I should stay with her, not in a relationship, though, but at least not go around wit other girls, right?
      I like this girl, but I'm not developing a crush, I just think she's really attractive and I'm really comfortable around her, but there are no feelings, at least not yet.

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    • Good luck! :)

    • Thank you! And thank you for your help too :)

What Girls Said 12

  • You just met her. She's not your girlfriend so do what u want. As long as u don't sleep with girls she knows

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  • What do you really have to lose by giving rings a go with her? So you don't get to have casual sex with women you haven't met yet, is that really a valid reason to not give something a go when you feel a connection? Seems you're trying to convince yourself that being able to have casual sex is more rewarding and worth while than a good relationship. That's obviously up to you how you value each but don't cut your nose off to spite your face...

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    • I know I know, you're right, but I just fear that I will get hurt, again. I don't know if I'll be able to trust someone with my feelings and my whole self, I don't know if I'm ready for that yet.
      I told her about this, about why I don't know if I'm ready for a relationship, but she still said we should try, and that's what we're gonna do.
      I wasn't looking for casual sex just to sleep with others, but because of not thinking I'm ready for a relationship.
      We talked, and we're gonna give it a try. I didn't promise anything, but we're still gonna try.

    • It doesn't have to be all or nothing to begin with, you just take it slow but don't deny feelings that are there.

      Best of luck with it.

    • Yeah, I'll take it slower, and thanks a lot :)

  • Is the only "part" of you telling you to not get serious your penis, by any chance?
    If you really like her & you guys connected so well why would you want to fuck it up?
    Maybe you should just talk to her about it.

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    • Hahaha, no it's not my penis, it's my brain.
      I don't wanna fuck it up, I just don't wanna get in a relationship for several, personal, reasons. Perhaps 2 months ago I would have gotten in a relationship, but I've dealt with too much when feelings are involved, that I don't wanna risk it again.
      I guess I'll have to talk to her again about this.

  • As long as you stay open with her about what you want I think it's okay but don't get your heart broken when she leaves you for another guy that does want to commit to her.

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    • We actually talked the other day about this again, and she clearly said that she wanted a relationship, nothing less than that. I told her I didn't know if I would be able to be in a relationship, and she told me that we could still try, and I agreed.
      So we're gonna try dating, and maybe we'll end up being exclusive, I don't know how it'll go.
      Thanks for commenting Belle :)

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    • Cool. Good luck with everything. :)

    • Thank you! :D

  • I think you should stick with her for a bit. See how things are going, i mean you've only just met her, get to know her and then see whether or not you want to sleep with other girls

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  • Are you asking if you should sleep with other girls on top of sleeping with her or forego her to sleep with other girls?

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    • I'm asking if I should go around with other girls or just stick with this one.

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    • Umm.. well, if you make out with her again, ask her if she's ok with sex that doesn't lead to a relationship before you actually have sex with her lol

    • Ok, next time I'll see her I'll tell her that. Thanks! :)

  • sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do LOL

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    • And that is?

    • you're the only one that knows the answer :P

    • Yeah, you're right xD
      by the way, she asked me if I wanted to go to the theater with her and her friends, just like a friend, should I go? I don't know if too soon to go on another date since I don't plan on getting serious.

  • Just go with the flow "cheesy I know" I mean iyou said it your self that you connected perfectly why not give it a try. But again that's depends on your reasons of why don't you want to get in a relationship

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    • Yeah, we did connect, but I told myself I wasn't gonna get in a relationship, that I wanna experience something else.

    • If you're not ready for a relationship then don't force your self into it cuz it wouldn't work any way. Just you need remind her every time what you really want cuz us women tend to interpret some actions in a wrong way.

    • Yeah, ok. Thanks :)

  • you should go for it with her... dont pass up a opportunity with the possible love of ur life...

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  • If you want to keep her around, don't sleep with other girls. If she finds out, you probably won't hear from her again (and trust me, she'd find out) ... is that something you're willing to risk?

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  • Have fun and do your thing. Just make sure she knows you're not looking for anything exclusive right now (she'll understand that means you're seeing other people). If you get locked into a relationship with her before you're ready to commit, you'll end up resenting her.

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    • You're right. I've already told her twice I don't want anything serious, I hope she doesn't think she can change my mind.

    • Girls always want to be the one to change your mind. That's where we are wrong. Don't let that stop you from being you and having sex with whoever you want. She's not your girlfriend, she's simply a girl you connected with. Just make sure you don't lead her on and make her think you have changed your mind.

    • Ok, thanks :)

  • If you want to stick with her, stick with her, but if you decide you want to see other girls, just make it clear to her that you don't want this to be monogamous/exclusive. Do that before sleeping with her, if you please. That way she knows and can decide if she wants to continue dating you knowing that or not.

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    • I've already told he that, twice before meeting, and she still wanted to meet. My fear is that she thinks she may convince me to get into a relationship.

    • Ah, yeah I think the part she may be focusing on is the "if it happens, it happens". I also don't know if everyone sees not wanting a relationship but still dating as synonymous with also sleeping with other people at the same time. I just suggest talking about it more so hopefully no one gets hurt.

    • Yeah, I guess telling her that gave her some hopes...
      She invited me to the theater with her friends tomorrow. She told me to go just as a friend, but I still don't know if I should go or not.

What Guys Said 6

  • Clearly you want different things, and this will end badly, so why not end it right now when you can hopefully stay friends?

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  • It's very understandable that you don't want to rush things, that you want it to happen naturally and enjoy dating. I'm just like you.

    Many guys will rush into it all and it often falls apart.

    You've let her know what you want. If she can't accept it then you will have to break it off before it gets sticky.

    If she can understand it, I would let your "relationship" with her blossom and take its course.

    However, just by the fact that she does want a relationship with you and is probably waiting for things to get serious, I wouldn't go looking to get with other women. If you want to get with other women, you should definitely think about ending it with her.

    Best of luck.

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    • Thanks. Things didn't work out, I didn't wanna be in a relationship so I broke it up. We dated for three weeks and we were too different, enough for me to not want to waste time in a relationship that wasn't gonna work.

  • I think you need to know her more to be able to make that decision. Its only been one date.

    ps. you belong to me not her.

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  • You should just wait and see how things go with this girl. Those other girls will still be there.

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  • in years... said the 19 years old. (who dated since he was 3 i guess)

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    • What are you talking about?

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    • Well, when it's 2 years or more you say "years", I never specified how many years, just that it's more than 1.

    • no, that would be improper. girls are not playthings for your entertainment. shall someone ask to "fool around" with your little sisters or daughters?

  • Stand your ground on what you said. Make it clear any relationship with you will be non-exclusive.

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