Why? Why does he push me away? And why does my ex come crawling back everytime he sees that I'm happy with someone else?

I'm currently dating a boy named Josh. Josh and I have been together for 8 months on May 25th. He means a lot to me, and he's had an extremely rough life. He has a very hard shell, and when I finally break that shell a little, he glues it back up. Sometimes it drives me crazy, he'll let me in for a few days then push me away back to beginning, and its very painful. Well, before Josh there was a boy named Patrick. Patrick and I were off and on for about a year and a half, its still a sensitive spot to talk about because the relationship was so cold after the second time we broke up. Josh treats me far better than Patrick ever did, but Patrick also let me in, sorta. at least he did more than Josh does. Anyways, to get to my point, Patrick didn't talk to me till he really found out I was happy, I was almost over him, but then he asked for me back, why? Like I realize he still has feelings for me and all, but doesn't he realize I'm already moved on? Why does he do this? It hurts me when he does because he knows I will always love him deep down, he was my first love, he always will be. I don't feel like its right to leave one person for another, I made sure to tell him that, but after I did he just went cold? He won't even talk to me as friends! And then in the mists of it all, I have Josh who let's me in then thriws me back out. Why? I love them both, but they both hurt me emtionally. So please just tell me why does Josh push me away over and over? And why does Patrick only seem to come back when I'm with someone, then go cold as stone when I tell him no? Please help me. I still cry out of confusion and disregard from the two. I need help!


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What Girls Said 2

  • I had a situation like this. One ex who I was engaged to kept coming back continuously once I got a boyfriend. I realized it was because he had his own self esteem and control issues and used me as a way to make himself feel better. "Oh look at me, I could totally get her back if I wanted". that's my experience. And if you love two people at the same time you might evaluate if you really love either. I noticed in my life that I kept having horrible relationships, and I thought "I'll never find someone good" or "why can't I find someone who will let me in?" These questions once consumed me, and then I realized that I was unhappy in my own life and attracted these men in order to create more reason to be unhappy. If I was in a bad relationship then that gave me an excuse to be unhappy. Once I dealt with my depression I was able to be in healthy realtionships.

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  • Sounds like a bunch of needless drama with both men.. Maybe YOU SHOULD LAY THE LAW DOWN AND CUT THEM BOTH OFF FOR GOOOD? and become a lesbian? Chicks are really awesome when you stop and think about it..

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    • Well, I don't like the thought of being with other women. So no go bro. That's a negative Ghost Rider. And its not necessarily easy to just let go of two people who have shaped you in a way that makes part of you, well you.

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    • Only those two, and only a little. Trust me, if they made me completely then I wouldn't be mostly me 😂
      I'm outgoing, I love myself most days, I listen to screamo, I don't go into a 'clique', because I choose I want to hang out with. Not because everyone around me chooses certain people. I've shared myself, but they shaped my emotional capabilities.

    • mmkkkkkkkkk... So you're not a follower or whatever? So you do your own thing and are not totally shaped and molded by those two people or whatever? Well, that's nice, honey...

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