Would you want to know before or after if a girl has a kid? What's you opinion? Would you tell?

Ok so there are two guys who have asked me out and one already knows I have a kid and one doesn't. My girlfriends are all telling me not to tell the guy who doesn't know, that I have kids. To me this feels dishonest, but my friends say that it's more don't ask don't tell.

I'm sure that I'd want to know, but when I talk to my guy cousin (who is dating a girl with kids) he said that he didn't care that she didn't tell him right away because he would have left without getting to know her and then they wouldn't be together now.

The difference is that this guy is younger than me and just got accepted to a top university, my cousin was 3yrs older than his girlfriend.

I think that the guy might know because he saw me with my son at the park but when he came up to talk to me he didn't really ask so I'm not sure if maybe he just thought it was a sibling.

Anyhow, what do you guys think

  • tell him the next time you see him
    90% (9)70% (7)80% (16)Vote
  • tell him after the date
    10% (1)10% (1)10% (2)Vote
  • tell him after 3-5 dates
    0% (0)20% (2)10% (2)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I think it would be very wrong if you didn't tell him about it before the first date itself. And suppose he doesn't want top date girls with kids, then you too will be left heartbroken if he stops seeing you for this reason alone.

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What Guys Said 7

  • You don't really need to tell them before the first date if you don't want to, but on the date during the get to know you tell me about yourself part comes up, something as big as you have a kid should definitely be in the conversation.

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  • When she trusts me enough to see her kid or meet her, but as soon as possible would be better.

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  • Tell him asap.

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  • I guess I'd wait until you get to know him better unless he asks if you have any kids

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  • It wouldn't bother me in the least bit i love kids

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  • I would want to know.

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  • If you hid that I'd just leave your ass.

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What Girls Said 2

  • That is the FIRST thing I ask after I ask the name. I don't ever want to waste my time with someone that has kids. What if these guys think like me? They would see you as a shitty person for hiding it. But then again they should ask that too first date.

    No offense to all the single parents, that is just my preference.

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  • I think its wrong not to tell someone you have kids before the first date. If they aren't grown enough to want to take on the responsibility of a child them they dont need to be in yours or your kids life.
    just saying.

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