Break up? Regret? Or did I do the right thing?

I met him in January. We got a long great. Laughs. Chemistry. Everything was perfect from the start. In March he tells me his ex girlfriend is pregnant and he just found out. She lives in another country tho. He said he would respect whatever decision I made but he needed to tell me because of how good things were going with us. I decided to keep seeing him. But my mind was not the same anymore. I started stalking. Wanting to find out about the girl. Anyway the girls says they are still together... Even tho he doesn't live there. Ok fast forward... The baby is going to be born in August (soon!!) and the closer the time comes the harder this is. So I decided to break up with him on Saturday.

I told him I didn't like the idea that the girl thought they were together and he hasn't been doing anything about it. I wasn't comfortable with this whole inbetween dating and friends. Where he isn't my boyfriend but isn't just my friend either.

He told me he has never told me his feelings for me because he didn't want to hurt me later on because he doesn't know how he will react when the baby is born. He says he wants to be with me and wishes he could have met me a few months before. And he understands and respects my decision even tho it hurts. He said the last thing he wants to do is hurt me because of the feelings he has for me.

I asked him what he meant and he said when the baby is born I want to bring him to the United States... And if the mom doesn't let me I might have to marry her and bring them both. That right there broke my heart. I understand he wants to be with his kid but marrying her. Kills me.

I let that be. We were texting a little and he asked me, " if things would have been different, where do u think this would lead to? Would u have married me in a year?"

Why would he ask that. I'm sad. I want us to be together because I haven't felt like this about anyone. Could it be his ego just asking that question? Or does he actually care?


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What Guys Said 1

  • Meh... he wants to have it both ways, but he can't. He has feelings for you, but he's trying to do the right thing for his child. It's a big mess; you did the right thing by ending it. If you want drama in your life, that's what the theatre is for.


What Girls Said 3

  • wow :(
    that sounds like a pretty crappy situation...
    don't let his texts get to you. he's a jerk. just try and move forward... it will take some time for the pain to go away but you will be ok in time...

  • I don't think he actually cares.

  • You did the right thing. You'll feel that way for another person eventually. No one deserves that kind of baggage.