Girls, Would you be ok if your boyfriend worked at a female strip club - as a bar tender?

I've been with him for a year and things were going ok. However the thing that's bothering me is his new job. It is the fact he's working late nights as a bar tender at a female strip club in the city. to be honest I want him to quit his job, it might sound selfish but I think its inappropriate for him to do that while he's in a relationship with me. I want to tell him how I feel but I'm kinda nervous because I don't want to upset him :(
I don't know I feel confused I need advice on what to do next? How can I make myself feel better?
The below options are my ideas on how to solve this...

  • he should quit his job -he is in a relationship with you!!
    36% (15)
  • Maybe he should continue working there
    29% (12)
  • Leave him
    24% (10)
  • Other
    11% (5)
And you are? I'm a GirlGuys can not vote on this poll

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18

Most Helpful Girl

  • If ANYthing makes you feel uncomfortable you should learn to talk about it to make things better. Why be so scared of him getting angry? If he is this way, then that is your issue together, the fact you feel you can't express yourself without being snapped at. You need to talk in order for him to explain himself or to put your mind at ease, or else listen to how you feel so that he can take in to consideration what working there is doing to you. Love is about respect and communication makes things so much better. Whether it's this, or something else, you have to be comfortable to just find the timing to get things off your chest so you both can work things out. Who knows, he might tell you that things are ok and not to worry, or he'll consider getting another job because he might feel it's best to after hearing how it makes you feel. But you won't know unless you try. Good luck! :)

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What Girls Said 17

  • Its a job...
    If he isn't getting lap dances as compensation.. it's just a job.
    I get that it's more difficult to keep your composure when you know there are more than half naked women dancing not 5 meters away from him, but if he's a good person, if he likes women who have more on than off - a bit of mystery, then you have nothing to worry about.
    It just depends on what kind of a person he truly is and how much you trust him.

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  • media3.giphy.com/media/H6CW8SL6vgVb2/giphy.gif

    To be honest you sound selfish. Jobs and money don't grow on trees. It's not inappropriate, he going strip club for a lap dance he going so he can pay his bills. Don't you trust?

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  • A job is a job. As long as he isn't flirting or being inappropriate let the man work there. You can tell him how you feel, maybe even drop by the club and check in to see how it is.

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  • If he did and still wanted an exclusive relationship with me I'd be impressed lol

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    • You didn't offer a yes option

    • On the other Anne being afraid to talk to your boyfriend is bad. You should feel free to talk to him about anything that affects you or him in the relationship. If he can't respect that you should dump him.

  • You have to be able to trust him. If you don't think you can trust him because he's working in a strip club you may need to reevaluate your relationship.

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  • I think you should ask yourself why you feel so uncomfortable him working there. Is it that he will see (and most likely get to know) the strippers? Is it that YOU will feel embarrassed to tell others where he works? Do you feel jelous? What's your reason? Once you figure the exact reason you should work on it and express that to your boy friend. Most likely he is seeing this as just a job and a way to have some income.

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  • Maybe you should go to his work and see what it is all about! It might be fun and interesting. Just saying!

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  • If this is truly a source of income and he has nothing to do with those women, then idc

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  • You should talk to him about it and tell him how you feel. Maybe visit the club to see how it goes.

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  • I don't know if id be okay with that he can be a bartender anywhere else

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  • I wouldn't do it.

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  • Don't try to change him
    If you like him and trust him then don't worry about it
    If you can't handle It then walk away.

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  • If it bothers you that bad give him an ultimatum and if his strip job means more leave him, places like that are for dogs and it's pretty gross I'd feel the same way. I'm sure you will be okay and find someone new IF it doesn't go as planned. respect yourself make sure he does too

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  • Ugh he is an asshole for working there, why can't he have another job? Why does he want to work there?

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  • i say just leave you really can't change a person and he will likely cheat on you with one of the whores anyway.

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  • You need to trust him. What was his motivation for getting a job there? Perhaps he really needed money. I know it's not an ideal situation, but only time will tell. If he ends us cheating on you, your intuition will tell you.

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  • Talk to him about how you feel. If he loves you, he'll understand and try to accommodate you. But jobs don't grown on trees.

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