Why does rejection hurt?

Why does rejection hurt? Why does it make you feel stupid?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Rejection hurts because people have this tendency to seek acceptance. If someone rejects them, they usually take it personally and feel like they're not good enough, that something's seriously wrong with them. Also their hopes get crushed, they imagined how awesome it'd be to be with a person and then, boom, reality strikes and they realize it was all an illusion.

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What Guys Said 12

  • It's just the mind's inability to handle the stress of competition, and that's all life is... competition. When people apply to colleges they usually choose three schools of varying difficulty in case their first selection turns them down. Kids in high school try out for sports, often realizing there's a chance they won't make it. And when the time comes for you to get married, are you going to pick the first guy you meet, or will you ditch a lot of frogs before you select a prince?

    If you take rejection personally, perhaps consider lowering your sites a bit... not to the gutter, but within striking range. Just remember that the only place reward comes before risk is in the dictionary.

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    • I can't take it personally, but it can hurt. I think I just feel more embarrassed because I will see this guy again.

  • Rejection does hurt in every kind of situation not just in love. Sugar best thing is to lock the thoughts that you are less in a box and throw it in the river because I'm sure you are beautiful, young and sweet at heart :)

    Make friends who are as sweet as you, do you know that you are average of three people you hang around with? :) I'm sure loving friends will take away the thoughts of being rejected and you'll be ever more confident.

    I'm sure you are gonna dress like you are gonna meet love of your life, he might be little late, of course he might be stuck in traffic somewhere ;)

    Love and wishes :)

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    • Thanks for your kind words :) I can't tell my friends about this because my friends would say I told you so. They knew he wasn't into me a while ago and I didn't want to listen, I wanted to try.

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    • Ha, yeah

    • How are you holdin up? :)

  • Castle of dreams are made of glasses and after a rejection you have to walk on the broken pieces of that castle, which is painful.

    Rejection makes you feel stupid because deep down you feel that you knew the castle made of glasses won't sustain, but you made it anyway.

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  • Rejection is not suppose to feel good, but if you've been rejected many times, you get used to that feeling and eventually won't mean as much. Trust me, rejection and me became best friends a long time ago

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    • Don't worry though, just brush it off; the right guy you deserve will come knocking to you one day. A guy who respects you, trusts you, appreciates you and loves you for who you are. This is just one of those bumps along the windy road. Hope you feel better soon.

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    • Who wouldn't want to leave in that situation? You felt hurt and somewhat humiliated. Do you see him often in the gym?

    • Usually just on the weekend... today he usually is not there... He said he was on there on his "lunch" break..

      But I try not to run from situations that make me uncomfortable... that will not get me anywhere.

  • coz u LIKE the person dat rejected u

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  • It is just when we are low every insecurity we have is screaming in our ear.

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  • Humans were never ment to be emotionally hurt. Evolution has prepared us to tolarate and face all sorts of physical pain and fears. But we have no defencs against emotional pain and rejection. Only time will heal emotional pain. I am sorry you are hurting. It will get better. Good luck.

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  • Because you're basically told that you're not good enough.
    For whatever reason it might be, being told you're not good enough always hurts, and makes you feel stupid and unsatisfied with yourself.

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  • If you reveal your feelings for someone you are leaving yourself vulnerable for their answer. It's not bad to be vulnerable, it's good to be vulnerable especially with the people you like in my opinion. I was rejected a week ago tomorrow I know how you feel right now.

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    • Why, didn't I just stop the first time? I tried a few times to get him to do something and I didn't want to believe it.

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    • Thanks :) I know, just frustrating waiting for a fish to bite.

    • I feel you! Good luck :)

  • because mother nature wants us to reproduce. if you get rejected its a sign you need to try harder next time. mother nature finds it important that you find a partner.

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  • Because you made yourself vulnerable ^_^

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  • your feelings got trampled on that's why

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What Girls Said 4

  • Honestly, if you constantly feel like someone is not treating you with respect, check your price tag. Perhaps you’ve subconsciously marked yourself down. Because it’s you who tells others what you’re worth by showing them what you’re willing to accept for your time and attention. So get off the clearance rack. And I mean right now. If you don’t value and respect yourself, wholeheartedly, no one else will either.

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    • True, I am done giving this guy the time of time. I gave him the benefit of doubt too many times and now if and that is a big if he wants to ever do anything in the future... i just can't. Some guy will come along and sweep me off my feet and if I am focused on this guy then I many miss this other guy.

  • Because it makes you feel like you were not enough for the object of your affection.

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  • I think it hurts the most when you take forever to build up the courage to confess your feelings for someone and they don't feel the same at all..

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  • Oddly enough for me, it feels worse when the guy barely knows me than when it's someone I like. When it's someone I like, it hurts a lot and I have a cry for a few days. When it's someone I am asking for a casual date who I barely know, it hurts, I feel stupid, humiliated and I feel like I don't want to try again. With the guy I liked, I give myself a few days to let myself cry and then move on. Then I am stronger, and I do whatever I can to move on. I feel the need to move on and meet guys, it gives me motivation to do something. It doesn't make sense why getting rejected by a stranger gives me multiple emotions.

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    • The guy barely knew me... I have no idea why but I feel like he judged me off very few things.

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    • Agree! Always look your best :)

    • Wow, always surprises me the way guys let girls down. Why not be nice? They don't like rejection anymore than we do... You would think that they would think before they speak...

      I hope this works out with the new guy :)

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