Just drunk hooking up? Should I just cool it and see if he will reach out to me first?

For the last five months, I have been hooking up with my best friends brother. In the begining we we went out on a few dates (he asked me out and was very persitent and this was after we already slept together) when I was home for the holidays for two weeks, but I was away at school after so our relationship was just super casual and we'd basically just hook up when we saw eachother and we talked a few times a week. But now I'm back in town and Im living with his sister so I see him all the time, since he lives close. I have started to get feelings for him and I do like him, care about him. He told me he thinks Im a cool girl to hang out with and that we really hit it off. I want to stop being just a casual hook up thing with him though because I dont want to continue hooking up and getting hurt in the end. Im not sure how he feels about me either... I want him to take me more seriously but I don't know if he will since we have already slept together:( But I have stopped sleeping with him currently but he always iniatates kissing me when were drinking or even just when were alone hanging out. We're both kinda weird around eachother and I guess I would also be to blame because I dont really show him interest when were together (Ie im not very touchy or flirty with him, but he's not either? I feel he might be a bit shy?) But when were in a group of people he gets quiet with me and barely looks at me, unless he's had a lot to drink then he'll kiss me infront of everyone hold my hand etc. But he'll always do things like sit right next to me. But he hasn't really asked to hangout just us two, he did a couple weeks ago and offered to drive me home so we could be alone and kissed me on the drive home. I dont want it to turn into just drunk hooking up. How to stop and avoid that from happening? and I usually reach out to him first, so maybe I should just cool it and see if he'll reach out to me first?

Updates:
I also drunk texted him telling him I liked him last weekend..

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Most Helpful Guy

  • well I hate to say this but you're both at fault for this situation. because you both didn't come to terms as to define the relationship it in turn caused for there to be confusion hence the awkwardness. now I can't go as far as to say whether or not he has feelings for you as well but what I can tell is this. Unless you pull him aside and define the relation nothing will get better. you need lay it out and tell that you want to become exclusive and if that can't happen then you both need to stop hooking up with eachother. the idea that maybe if I wait he'll notice me is stupid. guys are not mind readers most guys can't pick up on signals like the ones you described. just be honest but beware it has the chance of you hearing the opposite of what you wanted to hear. you have to be prepared for the worst. If he says no , my advice, avoid him for awhile don't hang out with him don't call/txt him. you need to distance yourself. don't go out of your way to be a bitch to him but don't fall for any of his antics either. this is when he will realize that you were serious and will either A) come back to you wanting to be exclusive OR B) Let you go and move on to the next girl. which if he goes with B you're better off with out him. anyways I hope this helped I understand that this is just my opinion but I hoped I helped alittle best of luck.

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What Guys Said 10

  • hahahahha f he does those things in a group, it's ok i guess... i guess he's not ready for sth personal though...

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    • Whats the last part of your comment mean?

    • Meetin each other... him and u only

  • is he a constant drinker? better avoid if so...

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  • y u post this continuously? once isn't enough? :/

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  • did u show him any clear signs dat u like him?

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  • maybe be nice n flirty when u are around hi,?

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  • as i told if he gets quiet in groups only... t's good :)

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  • if he gets quiet ONLY in a group... it's a good sign :D

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    • how so?

    • coz wotit counts more... is wot he does when he's alone wid u 8)

  • Sometimes we see nothing, need a hammer to hit him

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  • I trust you!

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  • He's so oblivious!

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What Girls Said 12

  • I don't have any helpful advice.

    Act normal like you do.

    If you know he won't return the feelings then distant yourself from him or a while to get your feelings under control.

    Update on how things goes?

    Wish you the best. :)

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  • Way to go!

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  • Yes!!!☺️😊👌

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    • Thanks:) Any more advice? do you think he will do something tho?

  • i think he's interested.

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  • ohh he likes you!

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  • He ended up trying to kiss me obviously, and I wouldn't so he got super mad. And he was too drunk so I told him that and he ended up being really rude to me so I left and then he ended up leaving..

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  • Don't kiss him back!

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  • he doesn't notice.

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    • how do I show him or make it obvious?

  • you should tell him.

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  • just cool it and see.

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  • just act normal.

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  • yes just cool it.

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