I've been alone all my life. I only had one friend, which I no longer talk to anymore, because he started dating and forgot about me. I never got used to being alone. I'm also a 20 year old introvert (a forced one) who never had a girlfriend, and even though I've been liking myself for all my existence, I never knew what is like to be loved. I never knew what's like to have someone by your side who thinks you're special and cares about you. I consider myself to be an attractive young man, both physically and psychologically. I'm in college, and have a fair share of friends and there are LOTS of girls, but I get ignored by most of them. Virtually every girl seems to look at me and not see someone attractive or good in any way (and contrary to popular belief, to get a girlfriend, you're not the only one who has to find yourself attractive, you need another person too)... I'm to the point where I get really amazed when a girl looks at me for more than two seconds (even though I don't act like a creepy stalker when that happens). So, it's obvious that'll I wasn't made to be loved. People say that "there always someone out there for you", but that doesn't sound like it's going to be my case. How do I accept the fact that I'm going to die alone with no one by my side? I've known people who did it, but I don't what were the steps they had to accomplish. How do I accept this soul-crushing reality?
Most Helpful Guy
Most guys put themselves in the friend zone. When was the last time you approached a girl on campus or in the mall? Do you have a online dating profile? Women are going to randomly knock on your door and ask if you want to have a relationship with them.
You can change your situation, it will not be easy but it can be done. Your first step is understanding how things really work. The psychology and sociology of dating and relationships. If you have ever learned any skill such as playing a sport, a video game etc you can learn to be good with women.
99.99999% of Main stream dating advice is bullshit.
Men are attracted to personality and looks, but mostly looks. Women are also attracted to both but for them its mostly personality. Confidence is key, which is apparent you lack by the wording of your post. You are scared girls will think your a creepy stalker. That means you care way to much about what they think of you.
If you care what they think of you then you are seeking their validation = not confident.
Don't focus on just one girl, its a numbers game. Like sales. If im a salesman only pitcedh his product to a few people he is not likely going to get anywhere. What if he pitches to 100 people to get a sale, then so be it. Dating is the same way.
When talking to a girl what she thinks of you should be the last thing on your mind. Be who you are and say what you want. Some will like you others will not.
Most of our ideas of how dating should work is a social construct and completely contradicts how our biology works.
If you are interested in pursuing this path google is your friend. Its a difficult path to follow, at least at first. You are already depress and don't have many friends so you really have nothing to lose anyone.
Either accept the status quo or see how deep the rabbit hole goes. Either way I have done all I can do, at this point you are on your own.1