Girls, do you want chivalry to be dead?

I am 60 years old. When I am with my lady, I open doors, I pull her chair out for her, I run to the car to get the umbrella and come back for her; you get the idea. It's called chivalry, good manners, etc. I wasn't born knowing to do those things; I was taught by my college fraternity. (Yes, that's right. Rolling Stone didn't even get part of the story right and they ignored the majority of the good things that happen in fraternities.) This behavior generally scores points with ladies in my age bracket.

I understand that most of the people on this site are much younger. I often hear younger guys making fun of chivalrous behavior but I have heard younger girls say that they wished younger guys would get it and act more like gentlemen. So, here's the poll. Send a message to some younger guys with your vote.

  • Yes, I wish more guys would display some chivalry.
    85% (22)62% (10)76% (32)Vote
  • I really don't care; I'm not going to be impressed
    12% (3)25% (4)17% (7)Vote
  • No, chivalrous behavior is stupid and demeaning to women
    3% (1)13% (2)7% (3)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy
Updates:
@evenlift Almost 90% of the women who responded want men to display more chivalrous behavior. You can convince yourself that you are right as you sit alone in whatever cubicle/cell you call home, but don't let the title "Master" go to your head. I have no problem getting dates and having fun and women enjoy spending time with me, so tell again how wrong I am. With the attitude you displayed towards @GoldenHeart91, I'm "SURE" you are successful with the women, also.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Of course not. But every act of graciousness should be made with sincerity. That's most important. Not because you're trying to get something.

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    • Exactly! I joke about "scoring points" but I do it because I respect women and I can't imagine conducting myself in any other manner.!

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    • You are putting words in my mouth. Even men are sexist towards other men. springocelot pointed out that acts of kindness should be out of sincerity and not manipulation. I was pointing out that women can be just as manipulative if not more so

    • Actually, I thought your statement was ambiguous so I asked a question about your intent. If I thought I knew what you were saying, I would not have asked a question.

      Chivalry and sincerity are not mutually exclusive.

What Girls Said 6

  • I always say thanks to guys who show chivalry. Chivalrous guys will always get my attention and my respect more.

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    • So then logically you should show a man the same chivalrous attention that he shows you because you respect him?

    • Actually i have held doors open for men. I have paid for meals. I have assisted them if they needed help. I have pulled over on a highway to help someone restart their car. And i dont think of it as anything i just do it. I respect all living things unless they give me something not to respect. But as i said i respect men who are chivalrous its shows they were brought up right and respect women.

  • All I want from a guy is good manners. He doesn't need to go all out with pulling out my chair or with any other typically chivalrous move. He can do it, but I don't expect it. I feel like a very chivalrous guy would be bothered or offended when I want to pay for the date or take care of him in any way. If that's the case then he's not the guy for me.

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    • I'm a very chivalrous guy, and I can say it does bother for some reason to pay for a girl to pay for a date for some reason. I mean I suck it up but it just feels weird lol.

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    • @john2 I think a lot do, bur it's often still seen as out of place for a girl to pay for all the dates or make the moves or even exhibit any kind of traditionally chivalrous behaviour towards a guy. Okay, maybe not pulling out his chair, but holding the door open for him, for example. I've had guys in public jump in front of me so they could open the door for me, lol.

    • @musicbrain5 yeah. I know for sure I've never seen a girl approach a guy before and that's what most gentleman's do lol

  • If a man isn't chivalrous, I assume he has had a very low class upbringing.

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    • That mirrors my thinking on the subject.

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    • When did I ever say the respect wasn't mutual?

    • @MrNameless Chivalry doesn't mean it's all about women; it means that I appreciate my woman do much that I want to make her feel that she is adored and treasured. A good woman returns it to me by doing all the little things she can do to show me how much she appreciates me. If she wakes up first, she brings me a cup of coffee and wakes me with a kiss. At 8:00, she reminds me that the football game is starting and she changes the channel on the TV. When she knows that I've had a bad day, she fixes my favorite meal (and she knows what that is without asking because I told her 2 years ago.)

      With your attitude, you won't find those women, so you'll never understand. . . and you can continue to tell us that we are wrong. . . but you are the one who is missing out.

  • Ugh. It's dying like a plant left out in the sun for too long. It needs to be watered meaning it needs to have a comeback. I hate that guys aren't as chivalrous as they used to be.

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  • You deserve some respect.

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  • It's nice when someone does that, but it's not a must. I mean that I has to be sincere, not because you have to do it.

    And I don't agree with those girls who get mad when a guy doesn't displays chivalry.

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What Guys Said 6

  • Your user name says it all. Chivalry is an important code to follow, though I think it is just as important to implement it with men as with women. Character is the most important thing, looks fade, money can be lost, but character, the sum of your actions, thats forever.

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  • This I something that I believe in and do for any woman that is around me. I think it is important for a man to do this for his lady. I know I was in a store one day it was raining really bad and I offered to walk several of the customers to their cars so they wouldn't get wet including one person a wheelchair. They were all shocked and one offered to set me up with her daughter lol

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    • Same here I would do things like that out of respect, kindness and sympathy. I would do chivalrous things out of a good heart and to be kind/ courteous. I applaud you for still doing things like this, cause a lot of people think this world is cruel

    • @GoldenHeart91 Awe thank you. I agree the world needs a little more good in it. It doesn't take much to be nice.

  • That behaviour sounds nice to me what you were taught in your youth doesn't need to go away in our time

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  • I don't care to impress women by being chivalrous since its imbedded into my blood and won't stop anytime soon but from my point of view it seems that women want it to die

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    • I think that the women who dislike chivalrous behavior are a minority and they tend to be angry women who are not at peace with themselves.

  • I don't know if it impresses girls my age or not but I always do the type of stuff you mentioned just because I think it's the polite thing to do

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    • You've got it. It's not just behavior; it's also an attitude of respect. I enjoying scoring points with my lady, of course, but I would do it anyway. It's just part of who I am and it's the right thing to do.

  • Men shouldn't sacrifice themselves to women. And women shouldn't sacrifice themselves to men. There is no need for chivalry. I am glad that it is dying.

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    • I have never viewed respecting others as something that involves a sacrifice. In fact, I feel better about myself when I do such things, so I actually gain. If you view your relationships with women in terms of what do you gain or lose, I think you are missing an important part of the equation.

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    • its not sacrificing to me, i will hold doors or do sweet things for my boyfriend and never think i am sacrificing. It doesn't take anything from me to be kind to others or to treat my boyfriend with respect, care and show him "chivalry"

    • Agreed. Don't do it because society tells you to. Do it because it makes you feel good.

      This whole chivalrous thing makes women feel self-entitled and not makes them think its all about them, instead of mutual respect. Makes me sick.

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