Guys, this guy I really like just told me that he wants to kiss me, but he doesn't want to be 'dating'. Ie: he wants just a physical relationship?

What should I do? I think that I should just kiss him once or twice, and see how that goes. From there I might decide where I want to go in the relationship. What would you do?

Updates:
I will actually give a MHO to the first one to comment with an actual answer! I really need help here!

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18

Most Helpful Guy

  • Girl, you have the right to make mistakes. Maybe what you want is a real relationship, but he doesn't seem to want that now. Are you willing to go ahead anyway and experiment a physical relationship only? Maybe you could like it, even if it's not what you were going for. I say if you are ready to experiment (and maybe find out you don't like it), well go for it. If you are really intent on having a solid relationship, then don't do it.
    Just make sure you understand what you are getting into and are ready to deal with the consequences. For example. If you go for it, you need to be ready to deal with the fact that it may never be more than a physical relationship. No matter how much you want it, you will NOT change him ! You'll only end up hurt emotionally.
    Is that a good answer?

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What Guys Said 17

  • I would say don't kiss him and just think about it for awhile. If you want something emotional and he wants physical then it isn't going to change just because you got physical with him. It will just lead to disapointment for you when he runs off with someone else. If you really have feelings for him then let him know its all or nothing. It would be better for you in the long run.

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  • If you really like him, I assume you want something serious, and maybe hope kissing him and talking will change his wants to wanting something real too. I'm sorry but it won't. Guys like that who don't want a serious relationship don't change until they decide to or get hurt and realize what they do. If you're okay just as a fling kinda deal it's your choice, no judgement passed. But if you believe you can change him please save yourself some heartache and know it won't work

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  • What he's saying is he only wants to fuck you

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    • well, we both agreed that sex is off the table

    • Then I don't see a future with him. He's a jerk anyway. You can do better

  • He told you what he wants, and you need to assume that is the truth. Think about what you want, then kiss him if you want to kiss him. But don't kiss him thinking that he's going to change his mind about the relationship.

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  • You can try but don't be upset if he doesn't want to have anything more than a physical relationship since those were the terms in the first place.
    Personally I think you can do better since your young and have your whole life ahead of you, you'll eventually find someone who actually cares for you.

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  • Don't do it. He needs to work it out on his own, kissing him might just make it harder for you to break off if he isn't being sincere. Also, he probably is worried about losing his liberty to a relationship (time without his friends, less money, et cetera)

    He needs to convince himself that he is ready to shell out the money, energy, and time that it would take to nurture a long term relationship. This is a big step to take, and it must be done sincerely.

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  • I like how he word it out " a physical relationship " lol. He just wants to have casual sex, as long as you known what you're agreeing to, go for it..

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  • Seems so. Have you asked him why?

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  • He is in "lust" with you. Not in "love" with you

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  • If you want a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship with romance/dating, I would think it would be unwise to delve into a physical relationship. But the decision is ultimately yours.

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  • If you're not interested in a relationship and you're attracted to him then go ahead, but if you think you might want more in the long run. Don't do it.

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  • It's not really for you to decide what you should be

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  • well, are you ok with you being just, I don't know, kiss buddies?
    if you think he is suitable for an emotional relationship or for a physical relationship, because if its the former then you shouldn't engage in somthing you will regret in the future.

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  • i think he is desperate... if you really are ready to face all obstacles for him, then you should go

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  • He is looking for sex.

    If you feel you are going to emotionally involved in him do not move forward with your interest, you will only end up getting hurt in the end.

    If a guy can get sex without being emotionally connected to you, then he will NEVER become emotionally invested in you.

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  • If you want to be dating then I'd hold off on even kissing. It'll be harder to accept that he isn't interested in a relationship if you let things get even slightly physical. It's good to stick strong with what you want.

    Now if you are cool with just a hook up go for it, but know that if he's already told you he doesn't want to date you he's given himself a free pass to get a kiss or whatever else & run.

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  • Don't become a sexual object. He will use you until he is bored then he will move on to the next naive girl. Have some self worth otherwise you will be used physically. Tell him to fuck of and get himself a slut.

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