My girlfriend finds her cousin attractive?

My girlfriend and i are both 17 years old and have been dating for about 6 months and recently we both went on separate vacations with our families. She went to Mexico and I went to Italy. We really can't say apart and we love each other very much so we sometimes video call each other to talk and stay close, and note that i get jealous and protective of her very easily. We were video calling about two weeks ago and she said that her cousin looks "really good (note that he is also 17)" and i know that my girlfriend is the most attractive girl teenager in the family and her cousin is the most attractive guy teenager. And then, noticing my uncomfortability with what she said, she told me that i was way hotter than him. I managed to find out that she sees him twice a year to visit him and that they greet with kisses on the cheek. She tried to make me feel better by saying that he just looks "a lot better than he did before" and that he's her cousin (this makes it no better, cousins are not exactly "close family"). I feel really uneasy, considering that the day we video called was the day she met him again, and her outfit was quite on the "sexy" side. It's been three of eight weeks on vacation and we had our first argument ever during the second week and kept going. We know that we love each other and don't want to argue but it's hard. When i told her how i felt about her and her cousin, she suggested that i didn't trust her and then kept an attitude for the rest of the call, even when i apologized for my accusations. I don't know if i am being unreasonable but is it a bad thing that i am a jealous and protective boyfriend? I can trust my girlfriend with her cousin but i can't trust her cousin with my girlfriend, especially when she makes herself look ten times more attractive then she is when she meets me for a rather fancy event, and she's just visiting her cousin's house, with her defensiveness, i'm not sure i trust her. She's a good and honest girl. What should i do?

Updates:
By the way. I am not looking to be scolded for jealousy and being protective. I am looking for ways to deal with it ^-^

Thanks

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Calm down ans let me tell u... I feel u bro.. Like seriously.. .. The same thing i feel... The exact.. . Piece to piece.. .. I am overprotective of my girl and she doesn't like it very much and says i dont trust her... But i always its the guys i dont trust but i trust her with all my heart and soul. She never listens though. :(... Its a shame i know... We get in to some arguments too... Some too bad :(... My advice is... Calm down for now... Talk to her and tell her that u r really very valuable and important. I can't lose u. I trust u more than my life but i dont trust other guys. Girl... U r beautiful and just too hot for me and i feel really overprotective of u. Sorry my love but i just fear losing u a lot... Its better i die than see that day... I think these kinds of words that could connect to her heart would help... Try something similar... Best of luck... These work better with a sad and dismal face and if she is near by u and u can hold her hand... I know she is far... Try it on video chat... Tell me if it worked... :)

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    • Gee
      All of the other negative comments on how jealousy is a bad thing sucked. Reading yours made it a lot better :)
      I'll try this out and see if it works! Thanks!

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    • @SoleExecutioner when u wanna say something there are at least two ways... the gentlemen's way and the asshole way... being gentle and loving even while accusing is not bad... when u simply say u don't trust her just expect a long lecture bt wen u say u don't trust the guy and he can manipulate and ur innocent.. its different... try to say things without hurting the girl's feelings

    • well im not a man but even if i was i wouldn't say it the "gentleman's" way in other words, the sugarcoated bs way. being gentle and loving while accusing is next to impossible and just says you're full of shit or a coward... neither is good.
      If you mean you accusing her of being untrustworthy will give you a lecture then man up and take it... dont beat around the bush.. she could easily be untrustworthy and if she has a spine then she would actually find the whole "manipulated because you're an innocent flower" speech to be absolute insulting crap...

What Girls Said 3

  • Kisses on the cheek are totally fine. I kiss almost everyone on the cheek! My friends all greet each other with a hug and a kiss on the cheek, I greet my family on the cheek, even my cousins. They're a pretty normal thing. And she can say that her cousin looks better or looks good because she's probably just commenting on the fact that he doesn't look like a baby anymore. Teenagers are a kind of rough phase, remember, everyone looks like shit when they're a teenager. Maybe he's just getting out of that phase now and she's pleased for him. I think you're pretty unreasonable, I doubt she's doing anything.

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  • I know you said that cousins aren't close family but i think i would have to disagree. Many people are brought up quite close to their cousins and auntie's/uncles etc. She may have just been slightly taken back that you thought threatened by her cousin. She was probably just appreciating that he had improved his appearance. Plenty of people greet with a kiss on the cheek. Sounds like you have nothing to worry about and they are just a close family.
    If any feelings were for her cousin i think that would definitely be something to be worried about, whether she had a boyfriend or not.

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  • Wow, I think you are over thinking this! Could you also be a little bit jealous? I'm sure there is nothing to worry about!

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What Guys Said 1

  • Dude, you're 17, been dating 6 months and it's her cousin. First off, I have a really attractive cousin that I like to spend time with... never had an urge to kiss her.

    Also you're too young to be worrying about things like this. I could see if it's that you're 30 and your wife spends too much time with a male co-worker, but a 17 year old girl spending time with her cousin? Come on.

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