If I ever wanted a child when should the topic of disciplinary style be discussed?

For personal reasons, I refuse to associate with a man that believe in corporal punishment. I was wondering when should topic be discussed (how early in the relationship?)? I want to know who I'm dealing with and what are their ideals if I'm considering something serious as having a child.

If it's just for a relationship I wouldn't care too much but if it's to have a child, I'll definitely care a lot and want a man that has the same ideas. Same as I wouldn't want a man with a sleeping around past either.

Updates:
I don't think there is a compromise on such difference like sexual values, your views on how to discipline a child or having goals in life vs not having any goals whatsoever.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • of course, including so many other things... corporal punishment only hinders emotional growth of children and makes them to exhibit extreme behaviours... fear of parents is needed but it shouldn't be physical in nature... discussing about differences in ideology, perceptions, financial outlook etc. are also imperative while deciding to raise a family...

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What Guys Said 5

  • Honestly I am all for corporal punishment if I did something wrong as a kid my father took off his leather belt and hit me on the butt and if I tried to run away he'd catch me lol and I never did whatever bad act I had committed again. If I said a bad word my parents would wash my mouth out with soap sure I hated them back them for it back then, but I now I thank them for doing it because I realized when I got older that they did the right thing. Of course my father didn't always use corporal punishment it just depended on what I did smaller things just got me yelled at or grounded really bad things I got spanked or had my mouth washed out.

    If each parent wants to discipline their child a different way that's fine that's how my parents do it, but one thing is for certain I'll punish my children the same way my grandparents punished my parents and my parents me, I know it works, my child/children may hate me for it, but that's just the way it is you are their parent not their friend.

    And really I don't really think the whole kid punishment thing should even really be discussed unless you have a kid on the way meaning your wife is pregnant or your married and are trying to have a kid. All it does is make problems because your talking/fighting about something that isn't even here yet.

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    • Make sure you find a woman that shares your views. There is no way I would compromise on this and let a man hit my future kids with an object or his hands. I would have a say on this too.

      by the way I was also punished with the belt when I was a small kid and I hated it and still have some resentment towards my father. I actually lost some respect towards him. Unlike you, nope I have nothing to thank him on that. I still feel it was unnecessary and an invasion of my personal space (I didn't ask to be hit).

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    • @awesome_possum -shrugs- that's one of the problems with this generation no one wants to do what needs to be done.

    • To be honest I've known a calmed, polite girl in my HS that never got spanked.

  • When you see that fucker raise a hand at him or her. Tbh stay away from abusive relationships and guys who go out with friends a lot.

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    • Definitely. He'll lose me right away in that instance. That guy wouldn't even be worth friendzoning either.

  • I think it's totally okay to ask soon as you have the "do you want kids?" talk. Might as well get straight to the point, right?

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  • Once you get into the phase of talking about children which; would be a long time into the relationship for me.

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    • True but at that moment it would just be a relationship and that means I can still break up even if we were long into it.

  • Casually and somewhere around the 3 month mark.

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What Girls Said 1

  • hmm maybe when you are talking about kids

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    • Cool so I can then make a choice right there rather be stuck with someone that doesn't share my views on this.

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