So like i said i live in the bay area have been here for roughly 3.5 years at one point i did have a group of people i liked to hang out with but they all kind of disbanded and i lost contact with most of them. Also having a hard time getting dates and the few i have gotten where either ackward or they would cancle on the second date for one reason or another to which i would never hear from them again. Tried all the online sites free and paid, tried Meetup. com but just not really getting anywhere, the only people i feel any kind of friendship with is the people i work with in my department, my roomate, and my brother who also lives here as well. The girls here just are not looking for the same things girls from texas are, that and i haven't really dated anyone since high school so i am still learning how to date as an adult. Most girls just seem to lose interest, and i find it hard connecting with people as a friend. (I will admit this isn't really a new occsuance i have had similar issues in the past) Maybe i am just a difficult person to like or get to know, I don't know. Everyone around here is either really into being active and healthy, or really into partying, drinking, and going out all the time. I just don't care for those things much, sure a small group of people and the occasional drink is fine, but i like simpler things, like going to the movies, relaxing at home after working all week, listening to music, going to museumes, hanging at the beach, chilling and having a coffee. I think i am just not compatible with the life style of this area, before i came to the bay area i was under the impression i would meet a bunch of cool, smart, and laid back people but that has not been my experience. Thoughts? Advice? Words of wisdom?
Most Helpful Guy
"the only people i feel any kind of friendship with is the people i work with in my department, my roomate, and my brother who also lives here as well."
I'd focus energy on the few people you have around you. It sounds to me like the way for you to get to know people is through organic means and overtime.
Most people don't click the first time (friendships or relationships) but rather over time. Keep trying to network through the means of your friends now and eventually you're social circle will grow. Be proactive about trying new things you think you will enjoy and eventually you'll bump into people of the same interest. If not? you had fun doing something you like.
for me? I love being active, i play tennis and do crossfit and in doing so... i've developed a friendship with many with my same interest. I now go out and do other things outside the gym with them. So this worked for me.0