Guys, does a woman having kids from a previous relationship turn guys completely off?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Not necessarily. It's just complicated. Since I'm back in the dating scene again, I have seen many single women with kids looking for love, and some of the things that go through my head are:
    1. Raising kids is hard enough for parents, and it will be a lot harder to raise the kids of another guy who might not want you to take his place. Obviously the age and the number of kids will also make a difference.
    2. In my case, I don't have any kids, but if you already have 2 or 3, having another kid is just out of the question and who can blame you. That right there is my dilema, should I think about having kids of my own at this age or do I just give up, considering the time it will take to find someone worthy of being with and having kids...
    3. You're kids are your priority and I totally agree, but finding time to go out on dates or trips becomes difficult.
    But at the end of the day love will not care about that. What we see in a single mother is a mature woman who knows what she wants and is tired of games and Bs. (Hopefully lol)
    so don't loose hope and in the meantime enjoy your kids and enjoy life..

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What Guys Said 16

  • Well, my girlfriend has three kids from previous relationships, so it certainly doesn't bother me.

    When you say "turn off," do you mean in a relationship sense (i. e. won't date someone with kids), or a sexual sense (i. e. she's not sexy because she has kids already)?

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    • Both actually

    • Well, like I said, my girlfriend has three kids, and I love her, and them. It's certainly not a turn off for me, in any sense.

      I plan on marrying her, so I have no problems with the relationship aspect of a woman with kids, and she is the most gorgeous woman I've been with, so sex is not an issue, either.

      Just like anything else in life, there are some people that do, and some people that don't. If they have a probkem with a single mother, that's on them, not you.

  • No. One of my earliest love interests had a child. Things did not work out for me, but the problem was not the child.

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  • That question is so much dependent on the guy in question. You have had a few responses from a few guys who are all different people with different lives - so here is 1 more. I'm a single dad with a child of my own. Is she going to accept my child? Does she have 1 or 2 or 3 children or 10 (more than a couple and then they are going to start interfering with My child). How many fathers ( 2 children with 1 father I can deal with, 3 children with 3 fathers - nope). How involved is the ex father - if we were to get seriously involved am I going to have to see him 20 times a week? Honestly - most of these questions are going to be in the mind of Most men getting involved with a woman with kids (obviously minus the part about their own kids if they dont have any). So like I said - it is Really going to come down to the guy you are approaching, but trust me the questions I posed to you will be common, at least to any guy considering a serious relationship.

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  • Not really. Had a good relationship with a single mom... the kid's a little intimidating sure, especially since a lot of single mums are frankley on the broken side (who is single as an adult and isn't at least a little broken). But any guy worth having will love you as much as a mum as if you werent.

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  • I'm 20 right now however, I think it depends on my current situation. If I had kids already I wouldn't consider it a problem but if I didn't I don't think I would want to and I think this would be how it is for me at whatever age I'm at. However, I might just change my mind somewhere down the road. But no it's not necessarily a complete turnoff.

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  • It's a dealbeaker for me

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  • After a certain amount of time I become legally and financially responsible for those kids. From a purely logical perspective a childless woman is a much better alternative - it costs less to be with her.

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  • I would date and have sex but I would not commit or get involved as a serious long term

    Single mothers offer a high risk a low return relationship. Their also deep inside looking for a stable father figure as well as she knows kids raised by one parent are dramatically prone to hurting themselves and society without one.

    I've done research on this and I concluded it's bad to have a child outside of marriage. This is the best for a strong and wealthy society

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  • Maybe for the ones who aren't ready to have kids yet.
    Or they just want kids from themselves, the connection from it

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  • not at all

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  • You do know if the kid starts calling the new guy dad you can put child support on him right?

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    • Lol, no you can't. doesn't matter where the biological father is they are responsible till the child is 18 years old. Its actually very hard/almost impossible to give away your rights.

  • I shut ma eyes long ago 😔

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  • Yes. I don't even want kids of my own. So, there's no way I'm gonna hook up with a woman who has kids from another guy.

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  • I wouldn't say completely, but it would most definitely be a mark against her.

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  • it doesn't help.

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  • Nope. If anything to me it means:
    1. She obviously likes sex
    2. She's down for no condoms (most likely)
    3 She's got some experience

    Now if she has like 10 kids or a few kids from a few different dads then yeah I'd probably be a little cautious. But if we're talking 1-3 kids from one guy before and it didn't work out ehh... it happens.

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