13 year old dating a 26 year old?

im 13 but my boyfriend is 26. he's very sweet and caring but some people judge us :( age is just a # !! why can't people understand that why do people judge age differences? he loves me and i love him

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everyone is calling him a creep or saying I should run away, he's my bf! im not running and he's not a creep. when we met age didn't matter we just connected

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I'm not one of those people to automatically assume that he's some creepy old man with a beard and a white van who wants to manipulate you and hurt you because you made it clear that he's not. However personally I just think you are too young to really understand what you're feeling for him and you also have to keep in mind that what you are doing is extremely illegal and if he gets caught, not only will he probably get the living shit beat out of him by your dad but he will also spend the next 20+ years of his life in prison and be labeled as a sex offender.. It is natural for girls to gravitate toward older guys, or in some cases... MUCH older guys. However the fact that he'd go as far to date a girl who is barely scraping puberty should be of some concern. It should bring up lots of questions. You are in 2 totally different stages of life with 2 totally different levels of maturity. I think what he feels for you is probably similar to what you feel for him, the age difference itself is probably some sort of fetish of his and it excites him. Again though I'm not implying he's out to hurt you or "prey" on you but trust me when I say that I doubt he has any real feelings for you on an emotional level. Have you guys had sex?

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Ok, i'm 15 and my boyfriend are 19. But your situation is too weird

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    • I'm 15 and the guy I like is 18... But yes this is realllllllyyyyyyyyy weird

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    • Why is it always middle schoolers or freshmans/sophmores?

    • I'm 52 and the girl I like is 8 :D

What Guys Said 42

  • Tell me this is a troll attempt? Just the fact that you don't understand why this is wrong, is why you have to break up, besides many other reasons. Sure, age is just a number, but not when you're 13. He has finished his development as a human, which normally ends at 25, while you are at the beginning of your biggest changes, when you're figuring who you are.

    This is so wrong. I hope your parents don't know yet, cause if they knew I would have to have a talk with them, and I'm not even a parent!!!

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    • I can't tell my parents cause I know they would go crazy

    • Hahaha now you see how wrong this is? xD

  • simply it's illegal... age's just a # sure and i totally agree wid u... but only in legal ages.. here it's fuckin illegal

    where do u live btw?

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    • Actually no, it is not illegal.

      Having SEX with her would be illegal.

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    • uk so U18

    • @far2gud4u hhahha that's awesome... u should be proud of being so young-lookin now :D

  • -_- you're delusional

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  • I know you think nobody understands, but there's a reason everyone is so against it and judgmental and it's not just because it's illegal (which is a huge deal by itself). I don't care how mature you are for your age, at 13 you are extremely susceptible to manipulation, and any fully adult man in his mid twenties that is going after a girl who is literally half his age and barely even a teenager has issues. I know you don't want to hear it, but this many people warning you will hopefully open your eyes at least a little bit.

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    • but I dont know what to do, we love each other, why is that such a big deal? I know its illegal thats why I lie about my age when people ask sometimes

    • Look, I'm not saying he's a creep, but any normal, responsible adult would have walked away when you revealed your age. He's risking ruining his life by being with you. If he gets caught, he will go to jail and be labeled a sex offender for the rest of his life. Maybe you think that's just proof of how much he loves you, but is that what you want for him? Because you can't keep this secret forever and as soon as ANYBODY finds out, it's over and his life is ruined. Do you really want that for him?

  • And statutory rape is just 14 letters.

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  • When you grow up and actually will be old enough to understand what the problem is with this scenario, that's when you'll be mature enough to actually be in a relationship.

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  • I don't agree with age gaps at all

    But I do understand anyone judging it because it is pretty messed up...

    Some girl in my college went out with a 46 year old and he used her for sex and she new it.

    The way I see it is why would at 26 year old be with a 13 year old? Is he mentally unstable? Is he dangerous? Is he using you? Obviously he's into little girls and people go to jail for that and your boyfriend does too.

    But who cares what other people think? Ignore them and enjoy the experience whilst it lasts because I garentee you.. It won't last

    Aslong as you're happy then why care what people think?

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  • No... just no, that's wrong on so many levels and it is illegal.

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  • Nothing particularly unnatural about it. Contrary to other posts, it is actually NOT illegal unless the two of you are having sex.

    I would say that and outright double in age is excessive, 13 years difference isn't terrible when you are an adult. You figure, he will be 31 when you are 18. That really isn't THAT crazy.

    Generally, the rule of thumb is "Half your age plus 7". But even that idea is pretty relative to this place and time. Through most of history, a 13 year old and a 26 year old would have been perfectly normal. And for PRE-history, things would get much more politically-incorrect.

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  • 1. Why does a guy that old even look at a 13 yo?
    2. WHY doesn't he go after girls his own age?

    This has the foul smell of the

    orig11.deviantart.net/.../...l_by_catcatdragoo.png

    The WORST kind of CREEP.

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  • Woow he is such a pervert!!! Yukksss... now a days really people are so desperate!!! Disgusting!!!

    You are a minor... and he is a grown ass man who has some issues if he is dating a 13 year old !! Why isn't he in jail?
    He is child molester... I think... and you are definitely an idiot!!

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  • Y'all mawfuckes need Jesus.

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  • Its illegal, and your boyfriend is a pedophile and most likely dangerous. He is exactly twice your age! 😟

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  • I frankly doubt that you both love each other. He is definitely using you, because a normal man would have ran for the hills the moment he found out your age. And I doubt you truly love him, you may think that you do but believe me when I tell you that love doesn't happen very quickly. I'd say that you are more likely insecure or intimacy-starved and he is giving you the attention and intimacy that you crave and as a result he feels important to you.

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  • What the actual fuck... This is a joke, right?

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    • No -_-

    • Are you aware that is illegal in most places? If he engages in sexual activity with you that could result with him charged with statutory rape.

  • It's not the age that is the problem. Its the fact you are not legally allowed to and that will cause terrible problems for you both if he came out.

    If it was 18 and 31 it would be less of an issue. Sadly you have to accept that as part of the world.

    I can don't judge it myself it is your lives after all, but that is the reason there is the problem more than anything.

    If it's really love then wait till you are of legal age and hang out till there but nothing more.

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  • Well as long as you guys wait to have sex until you are of consenting age I have no real issues with it. And furthermore I am not your dad so my opinion doesn't really matter.

    The only problem is that because he's twice your age, he definitely holds a position of power over you. I hope he doesn't abuse it.

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  • He was legal age for sex when you were born, think of that. Legal in uk=16 I don't know where you are

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  • I do believe age is just a number, but you are only 13, you have to live a lot more and then think about dating someone older than you, even if he has the best intentions he can go to prison for that

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  • Run far away. Far far away.
    Wait hello what?

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  • Go for it. It's perfectly fine.

    That's what you wanna hear, so now give me MHO!

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  • wow, really... that can't be right :(

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  • sick troll son

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  • no no no no and no again...13 year gap is fine when you are 18 but you are not.

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  • Why haven't your parents pressed charges? I know i would and put that creep in prison.

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  • I don't think it's appropriate.

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  • Your boyfriend is a peso you could get him in trouble

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  • No, no no NO just no

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  • Ugh... yeah, that's creepy pedo.

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  • Oh yeah I remember you weren't you that one girl who said you gave him bj in school?

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What Girls Said 38

  • WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK

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  • People are going to judge that because it's illegal. No one's going to convince you to leave him (even though you should) but I think you should think about exactly what's wrong with him that he can't get a girlfriend his own age and needs to prey on children.

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    • While I do agree, she clearly stated that he's not "preying." I don't think all relationships like these are necessarily some evil adult "preying" on some child. That's one common assumption people have wired into their brains/

    • She's also a 13 year old girl with a limited experience of romantic and sexual relationships, and of relationships involving adults outside of family, teachers and adults trusted by those two groups at all, who is obviously head over heels for someone much older and much more experienced than she is, who should know better than to get involved with someone so naive. She might have said that he loves her, but how many harmful relationships do we know about that use 'love' as a way to blind the victim to the danger they're in?

  • Failed troll attempt I would say.
    Hebephilia is not even a thing to joke about those people are sick af.

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  • Firstly I am concerned at how many people are talking to you no better thna your parents would and while I know its because they feel this is wrong, it doesn't help you. So, I think we will have a little bit of a convo here and we can just see what the deal is...

    Tell me how you met and what it is you feel you connect on?

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  • It's hard to don't judge because you are just starting now to hit puberty and he already ended university (if he did) and has a work. You are in different stages of life, and you are still new to hormones, sex and stuff like that and he is way more sexual than you. It can be the fact that he is a pedophile, but I don't know any of you, so I can't be 100% sure, but there are still chances... You have an age gap of 13 years, and that's a lot, especially at your age! If you would have been 20 and he 33, that would have been so much better than 13 and 26...

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  • Okay because you won't believe a word people say I'm not gonna sugar coat it.. you will either get raped or pressured into sex without feeling ready. You might end up being pregenant, be a 13 year old with a child, or he might kidnap you, your parents don't know about him so he won't have to cover he's tracks. He doesn't love you, he is a pedo who will drop you for the another child or worse YOUR child. He is a sick mother fucker and you are in so much danger and I hope your parents find out before some real bad shit happens you're a child, you don't know what love is, other than love with your parents.

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  • Child molesting.

    Gross.

    No 26 year old man would want you that is normal functioning.

    You are a baby to him.

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  • WHAT THE FUCK GIRL WHEN I WAS 13 I WAS PLAYING GAMEBOY. DO U EVEN KNOW WHAT SEX IS? YOUR PARENTS? HAVE U EVEN STARTED UR PERIOD? DO U EVEN HAVE TITS? GIRLLLL I WOULD SLAP THE SHIT OUT OF U IF U WERE MY CHILD.. PSH THIS GOT ME FUCKING HEATED READING THIS... END IT AND GO TO SCHOOL. UR A CHILDDDD!

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  • Whoelse thinks this is a troll?

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  • That is beyond illegal. He should know better. He is a pedophile. If he really loved you, he could wait for you to be old enough to understand the implications of this relationship. I know that you won't leave because children are stupid and think they're invincible. I just hope that your parents find out and charge him with statutory rape. He's a criminal and deserves to be treated as one.

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  • If you aren't trolling, this is so wrong and disgusting. It is so creepy. There is something wrong with a 26 year old who is dating a 13 year old. He should be in jail for that. I am 28 and there is no way I can see a 14 year old other then as a kid. You are just a child and he is a grown male. He's a pedophile. In this situation, no I am sorry to say that age isn't just a number. I hope someone calls the cops on him.

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  • That is not an adult relationship, he wants to date REALLY young girls. That's fucked up and seriously suspicious. What if he "connected with a seven year old, would that be Ok in your eyes because "age doesn't matter"?

    You're being incredibly naive if you think it's OK or normal. Age doesn't matter as much when you're an adult, you are still a child whether you like it or not.

    This can't be for real, I just cannot buy it. How do your parents allow this?

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  • People are not judging you. they are just telling you to be aware of your choices. I mean what the hell girl? You're just 13. You don't even know what love means. You don't even know what a real man is and I don't mean it in a perverted sense. I didn't mean to rude but I had to let it out.

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  • You are only 13, you shouldn't be dating a guy who is that much older. He is twice your age! That's crazy!
    img2.wikia.nocookie.net/.../621px-Pedobear.jpg

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  • Wah.. Did u meet when u were 12?

    Him: Jail time
    You: Gyno check up for police report filed by your parents

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  • Ummmm what? Have you even gone through puberty yet?

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  • SMH... Face palm

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  • you are a kid... dum dum... 13 years won't make a difference if you were 18+

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  • You certainly have a most vivid imagination.. You really are the female version of "Walter Mitty".

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  • He's a pedophile. He could go to jail.

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  • Oh, good lord. Please tell me you're joking.

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  • No, no, no, no. Just no. I suggest you dump this man, but I know you won't listen.

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  • Well usually when a guy has to go to young people to get a relationship there's something wrong with him. A lot of time they manipulate the other person in to doing sexual things.

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  • Your boyfriend is a pedophile and needs to try dating someone his own age and not half if it.

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  • This is trolling. Definitely trolling.

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  • Its a lot different
    He is twice ur age!
    May be u think its love
    It might be his care for u that u have misunderstood.
    It does happen at dis age.
    Jus don't be so serious u have a life to see ahead.
    Go wid d flow

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  • Wow, he's not even 18(not saying that it's a good age, just saying that 26 is a HUGE gap). I don't understand why you would go to g@g about it, most people will disagree with this.

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    • I would personally come for this guy, if this was my cousin or sibling. Pedofiles are sick sick sick.

  • TROLL

    ...

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