Did I ruin my chances? Can I get him to come back?

Did I completely fuck up my chances? Dating
So me and this guy have been talking for a couple months. When we started dating, things were amazing. We talked everyday, we had great dates, the sex was amazing and he told me he loved me. Well I got scared, and broke it off with him, but a week later asked him to come over because I missed him. I realized I was in love with him too.

We don't talk as often, and he seems to be a bit cold now. For the past month, he sends me mixed signals but he always lets me know he loves me and cares about me. The sex has gotten better. The thing is, I'm very stressed out. And when I'm stressed, I go to him for comfort, but with him being a busy guy too, I take it all the wrong way and blow everything out of proportion. I say things like he doesn't love me, he's using me for sex and I just act stupid because the stress I already have is causing me to be extremely paranoid.

I really care about this guy and I really want a future with him. He's always been weary about starting a new relationship, because he has a 2 month old newborn and he says that she's his responsibility, which I completely expect. Today, I had a panic attack from my stress, and I blew up his phone with messages and several long messages. I feel so stupid now, because I was able to calm myself down and now I look crazy. I know girls go through this, but what's a way i can reverse all this damage I did? He's been ignoring me for two days now and it's causing me to continue texting him.

I know he has feelings for me, and believe me, I haven't been myself for a month now. It's some personal issues, and he understands that part. Should I ignore him? I've already apologized for blowing up his phone, and I haven't texted him since. How do I get him to reattract to me?
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Most Helpful Girl

  • It seems here, dear, he is Getting your Number and the way of your ways With... Blowing up his phone...
    This, along with More in Store, has caught a sour ball in his throat and Now... He's been ignoring me for two days now.
    Stop the madness and let things calm down some. You are giving him your own Mixed vibes, and with his child to think of, he is getting scared now that you, not just him as you as two birds of a feather, are Not the One he may want in the nest with his little one.
    If all possible, you both need to sit down and talk things Out in a mature and civil manner. You have said things to him which is turning his stomach and turning him a way and with Other underhanded things that are just keeping this rowing and going, he is most likely doing some serious soul searching with wondering... What is best for him and his little one.
    You cannot Get Anyone to do anything when they feel this way and he may have already made up his mind. However, to be fair, if he really did care, he would contact you one way or another sand tell you... Yay or nay.
    If you both do decide to give it another shake, don't 'Shake' him off by giving him the Shakes with saying things that you know may not be true and acting like someone who he will get scared of in every way. You wonder why he is 'Wary about starting a new relationship.' This is not a healthy kind of relationship and you both are Not getting off to a good start With... I really want a future with him.
    Down the line, if you feel More Stress and Paranoia, it might be best to seek help for this. No relationship can stand on two good feet if there is Constantly... Defeat.
    Good luck. xx

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What Guys Said 0

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What Girls Said 2

  • stay clear from him and let him come to you...

    You are probably stressing because he has ignored you and its upped your existing stress level.

    You know you are not his priority and never will be though? He has a child who he will always put first. What happened with the girl who had his baby? was it a relationship?

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  • Your question was did you ruin your chances, well let's hope not. However, if you do want this to work were going to need much better coping skills. SO, with that being said you are a busy woman he's a busy man. He also has a newborn and when you stress you dump all of that on to him. Of course he is going to be standoffish. So whe you are stressed you can let me know that you are stressed BUT make sure that you have your own ways to deal with it and don't expect him to fix it. Write in a journal, talk to a female friend, your parents, go exercise, read, anything but you can't use him as the dump and expect him to make you feel better and fix it all the time. Since you apologized already I wouldn't text again till he replied. You don't want to bombard him or overwhelm him. Good luck Hun.

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