Guys, would you stop talking to a girl you like because you find out she is planning on joining the military? If so, why?

Is it wrong for me to want to continue looking for a special someone in my life even if I'm going into the military?
I didn't think so, but like clockwork everytime a guy finds out, he stops talking to me.

Updates:
Thanks everyone for your input. I do understand that some people just don't desire the military life. I definitely don't hold that against them. I guess I will just have to keep looking til I find that right one.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Every guy's going to be different and it's more of a personal preference. To me, her joining the military is kind of a turn off to me. However, I do know a girl that, even though she's been in the military, I still wouldn't mind getting to know her better. Usually, from what I've found, joining the military has a great affect on people's personalities. This happens the same with guys as it does with girls. No one's ever gone through the military and remained unaffected by it. However, I've also found that a lot of women that leave the military can end up somewhat cocky. That, to me, is a huge turn off. Call me chauvinist or something, but I just like girls that are feminine over girls that aren't. It's just my preference. However, the girl I mentioned before that came out and didn't really seem too affected by it I think is still really feminine (everyone has a slightly different take on what feminine means) and I'd probably still go out with her. If I hadn't seen the end results, first, then I probably would have been extremely hesitant. The military is kind of a mystery box where a person goes in, but you have no idea what's going to come out, at least from what I've seen. Would I stop talking to her? No. Would I possibly lose interest? I might just a bit until I knew what she'd look like on the other side. Would I lose interest in a girl that I had just met if I found out she had been in the military? Not particularly, but I'd be a little hesitant. The military can bring out stuff in people that's, sometimes, undesirable (undesirable for some, but awesome for others) so that's the only real reason I'd be hesitant.

    Now, that's just me personally. I know there are a lot of guys, though, that really don't care, much, about it. Also, if you met another guy that was in the military, previously, he'd be the most likely to not have any issue with it. And there are lots of guys that have been through it.

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What Guys Said 7

  • To be honest I wouldn't let that stop me from talking to a girl if she is going into the military. I think most guys know it's a lot of work. Long distance can be tough. But it's not impossible to make work. I had friends who went out with people who joined the military and they made it work. I think you would have to fins a guy who is on the same page as you. And it's not going to be easy but it's not impossible. At least your being honest and telling guys. So keep trying and dontw give up hope. You can find love any where

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  • There are girls avoiding military guys in some cases too. It's the lack of availability, chances of having to relocate, and so on. People want someone more available. They don't want to date someone then find out they're shipping off.

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  • Er... ish. If I really clicked with a girl It wouldn't stop me... but I wouldn't really want to start a relationship if she is about to go away for long periods of time at the whim of her employer.
    Can't really blame them.

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  • No, I would not stop talking to her. But I would persuade her not to join, because of the crap that goes on in the military. I have all the respect for those that serve, but there are still some douches that rape women in the military. I know someone who was raped in the military. Those that rape lose that respect I have. You don't have the right to rape someone and then get "immunity" just because you serve. You should still be brought to justice like a criminal.

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  • Because she will probably leave and I am not waiting for that shit. She might even die too which would suck. Not worst any emotional investment.

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  • Well it could be the guy wants to stay local and just stay in one spot his whole life and not do anything and not fool with moving/military etc

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  • Not at all, but if she already has a boyfriend, well, I would keep my distance.

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