The girl I like loves her ex, ugh?

So I've been talking to this girl. Its crazy that I'm so in love with her. I hate that I do cuz I feel conflicted by her moods. She told me she was trying to get over her ex and that she needed to work on herself and that at that time she just needed a friend.

We used to date a while back and we broke up mostly due to school and distance. So I hit her up thinking to reconnect. I am the longest relationship she's had and pretty great.

So when I was out of town she came to visit her ex. I found out, but I couldn't really tell her till I came back. I told her to call me and tell me what really is going on. She told me yes she did did go visit him and did his hair and that he understood that right now she wasn't looking for anything and just trying to find herself.

I'm trying to tell myself nothing else happened, but I don't know. She wanted me to be her friend while she went through this and I instantly said no. I didn't need to be her friend only to watch her go back to him. I told her we might as well not put a title on what we were and just go with the flow.

Has anyone been in this situation before?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • "Has anyone been in this situation before? "

    Yes and sorta.

    I dated a guy who went back to his ex. I didn't know he even still loved her. It blind sided me and hurt. I moved on though.

    I just spent my entire summer constantly with this guy, falling so in love with him, the whole time he's off and on with his girlfriend but he told our friend he has feelings for me, we cuddle and kiss and act like a couple and good god its like we're together. And then just recently him and his girlfriend got back together for real, and he's seeing her everyday instead of me. My hearts shattered.

    I'm cutting him off. That's what I'm doing to protect myself. As for you, you should straight up tell her to decide what she wants. So that you don't get crushed while she skips into the sunset with him.

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    • I would but I wanna see where things go I guess. I've emotional detached myself from the situation and rrriigghhhtt now I'm OK about it

    • Right now it seems okay. Right now

Most Helpful Guy

  • How do you know that she still loves him, though?

    If it's true that she's still in love with him, then you've gotta put all kinds of distance between the two of you. It'll be painful, but sticking around and having your feelings dragged through the mud will be much worse.

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    • I called her and she told me. She told me she was still in love worry him and that she sees a relationship with him and a friendship with me. I cut that shit of too quick. There are done women you can't be friends with even if you wanted to.

What Girls Said 1

  • I haven't been in this situation but I like the idea of not putting a title on a relationship for the moment. Sometimes, we don't realize the importance of the things in front us, until we lose them. Step back, give her the space she needs to get over her ex and make her running back at you, stop always "being" there. Sometimes you need to let time be the judge

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    • I've read that nothing is set in stone and even thou I don't know how things are I'm giving her space to hmu... I'm simply thing to grasp all this. At the same time I'm training care of business so I don't miss her and try to hit her up which is super hard.

What Guys Said 1

  • Dude, I've been in that situation.
    The only thing you can do is to cut her outta your life completely.
    You're gonna have to travel through a very rocky road if you want to continue this relationship and chances are high of you being used as a doormat.
    So leave her be , you don't wanna be a rebound guy.
    My ex broke up with me over a text message.
    So fuck her man you must have some important shit in life to take care of first compared to her.
    Good luck bro.

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    • I think it would hurt more without trying to see where this thing goes. I need closure and if she does go back to him I would know right away.

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