Dating guys that are way more into me then I am in them?

Is it my fault that I date guys that are more into me then I am to them? This seems to happen a lot and I always feel pressured to be concered about their feelings all the time... I dont consider myself a very fun or likable person so I can't imagine its my personality that makes them like me so much. . How can avoid this early on when im dating a guy?

When I know a guy likes me without me needing to do anything or at least making an effort I lose interest because I know I can have the regardless.. which also means that if we become a couple i'll have the upper hand.. I dont want that.. I want an equal balanced relationship


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Most Helpful Guy

  • So you want guys to play games with you and hide their interest (to an extent at least)?

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    • no, but i dont want a guy totrow hi mself over me after 2 dates.. when they do that i dont really need to make an effort.. it seems like i just need to be there and look cute most of the time. I wan ta gu yto be honest and staright forward, but when it comes to feelings and stuff i take a long time.. and i feel pressured when a guys show a lot of interest straight away because a lot of times i dont know what i feel and that makes me back off a little and even lose interest... I know its more my problem then theirs, but still

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    • I get where you are coming from. No, it's not that you want to play games, but it really does freak a gal out when a guy seems TOO into you after only a couple of dates. It's kind of scary not just because feelings can be scary, but also because men who become obsessed can be genuinely dangerous, so when a guy seems way more into you then you are to them, it can actually make you feel concerned for how he might react if and when you do choose to break things off.

    • I think it's just guys who are inexperienced. Each time I've dated a girl I've been less keen on her or cared less what she thinks of me.

Most Helpful Girl

  • If you find yourself not as into a guy as he is to you, you should not continue dating him. I've run into that several times as well. If we've been seeing each other a month and I'm still not gaga over a guy I call it quits before he gets attached and hurt in the end.

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    • Do you think you should be gaga after a month?

    • i know.. thats what i do. if i dont feel chemistry pretty much straight away i just back off

    • @Bysshe - Yes, I do. If I'm not feeling strongly towards a guy after a full month of seeing him, I think that's a pretty good indication that those feelings are simply not gonna happen and there's no point in continuing to pursue. Chemistry isn't something that develops with time - it's either there or it's not. When you first meet someone, it might take a few dates to get to know enough about them to really feel it, but it's either there or it's not.

What Guys Said 2

  • Great news for loving people like me...

    I try not to agree with the whiny, bitter guys we see so often, but this time you're making it hard to not see their point.

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    • Well I have issues so I wouldn't really use me as a good model for normal females.. im like this.. not every girl out there is

  • you can't help it. women are unable to love truly. dont try to overcome your nature.

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    • lol.. bitter men make me laugh

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    • Just because no woman has loved you, doesn't mean we don't love...

      I love my boyfriend more than I can adequately describe..

    • @Sara413 if that helps you sleep better at nights. you only THINK you love him. today you "love him" tomorrow you will "unlove him" thats how your species operates... .

What Girls Said 1

  • definitely. who's pressuring u?

    if u dont like him as much, leave him alone, because it's not fair for him to put his emotions into u when u dont have much to give back.

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    • no one is pressuring me.. but it feels lika i have to be aware of the other persons feelinsg all the time.. im not even aware of my own feelins most of the times

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