Girls, if you turned a guy down saying you thought he was nice but you just didn't see a dating future would if freak you out if he was persistent?

Like tried to talk you into giving him a shot?

We've hung out several times and it was always went really well, she seemed to be open to friendship but I want more.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I wouldn't freak since we were friends before
    At most I'd think you're slightly annoying
    But I've had guy friends do this to me to but not through words they just simply keep flirting and trying to make me laugh.

    It worked for some :) others not so much
    But I know some girls would flip and throw a fit

    You really need to rule your own judgement here based on how laid back she can be.

    Me personally I'm not going to throw a fit, yell or anything drastic even the 2nd time around unless he was a stranger and not a friend

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    • Yea. It's a strange situation. I usually just chalked these up to it being her loss. For some reason I feel like I want to say HEY all those positive things you said you think about me a normal person would want to date! We should at least try it. or tell her how I really think she's blowing it. But I should probably just let it go instead of blowing it up.

    • Aww.. You must really like her
      Well there's a 50/50 chance it works for some and not for others
      If it works great, if not usually getting rejected a second time helps people successfully move on with no regrets.
      Telling her all the positives about you and reminded her why she liked you =good actually kind of sweet :)

      Telling her you think she's blowing it or making a big mistake will get you a firm "f**k you", that feels like an attack it's offensive and would make me mad

      Fair warning:you maybe deep in the friends zone if she knows you fairly well all those positives could simply be a reminder of why you make such a great friend" if you two aren't that close or don't know each other that well it may work because they get to see you in a new light

    • thanks for the tips!

What Girls Said 4

  • Yeah, that would freak me out. I've already told him no, if he can't handle just being friends then he has to break contact with me, not keep pestering me. If I tell him that I'm not interested, that means that I'm not interested, not that I want him to convince me.

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    • I know it, I'm trying to talk myself into what I already know. It's just strange because she says she feels all these positive things about me but yet doesn't want to date. Part of me wants to tell her I think she's making a mistake but i should probably just let it go.

  • hell no. persistence is key my friend. persistence show that you care and that you fight for what you want. If a guy is persistent and was always trying to get me to go out with them, i would do it. Whats it going to hurt. one date, if it goes well, then great! if not, then go back to being friends, you dont even he=ave to put a date label on it. suggest a movie or a hike or something easy breeze that can be taken as both date and casual hang out.

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    • We have hung out casually a bunch. It always goes well. The problem is jumping from that to getting a change romantically. I suppose i'm sort of friend zoned though she knew from the first time we hung out that i was interested in more. It's probably not a good sign haha.

    • Just tell her, you see her and you being more then friends and would like to give it a chance of she's ok with it.

  • It could go either way honestly. It could make me really annoyed that you weren't respecting my answer, if I really didn't find you attractive at all. But if I liked your personality enough, and thought you were kind of cute, I might be able to be won over with persistence.

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    • that's what i'm thinking total toss up. probably best to kind of hint at it in person next time i see her and get an opportunity.

  • I wouldn't "freak out" but persistence once I've given a clear message of disinterest lights up a second warning for me: now you're the guy who won't respect my "no".

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    • I know and I usually accept a no, i've just never gotten a no with such mixed signals. last time we hung out we cuddled a little. She said she thinks i'm a great guy and that when were hanging out she had questionable feelings but still says she doesn't see dating in the future. I guess i just want to make sure these mixed signals isn't a sign to persist a little since usually i'd be moving on.

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