I'm bisexual and I can't express it. Help, I'm so sad?

Ok so I am 100% Bisexual. I've had crushes on both genders since I was about 7, I used to often cry about it because I thought I would go to hell. My family is open to gays but does not believe bisexuals exist, that they're are just people who want attention. Growing up I was so confused, I thought I was a lesbian because I had a crush on my bff, then I began to like a male celebrity and told myself I'm straight. This occurred on/off my whole life. Then when I was 13 I made out with my bestfriend often for about a month and we touched each other one time, (my first orgasm) to this day I am mortified by my actions, I stopped talking to her, prayed for forgiveness and I even spoke to a priest about it :(. Anyhow now I am engaged to a lovely man from Russia, I love him <3 but he's conservative and I could never tell him of my experience. Well, currently our close friend is newly engaged to a woman that I am soooo attracted to! She is the most gorgeous thing, I can hardly stop thinking about her after we have double dates or we get our nails done. I can't help but imagine doing sensual and sexual things with her. The most tempting part is, she is very relaxed and open, I'm confident that if I approached her in a sexual way she would not deny me. And lately I've been desiring a multiple partnership, for instance me, my fiancé, and a another woman. I want to have threesomes, a female body to touch, equal treatment between all 3 of us, share a bed, maybe the woman and I could both have his children and raise them as siblings in our big family <3. I feel so guilty for daydreaming this but honestly it's my core desire. I would be so happy to live this life, I'm even depressed that it will never happen. but I'm so scared to introduce the idea to my fiancé and my biggest fear is that it's immoral, I don't want to go to hell :( .


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Most Helpful Guy

  • You need to seek help and call your wedding off because your going to end up in divorce dont so this to the future kids. You can't be ready for a marriage wanting to have 3 somes

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    • True Christians often times desire many things that they shouldn't. A "true Christian" is not to give in to these desires. I said it's just a dream of mine. I haven't had sex of any form (not even my fiancé) exept for my horrible mistake with my bestfriend. I go to church on Sundays and try my best to please god. I am speaking my mind. I could never live with the guilt of multiple partner marriage, my post was how to confess my desire to the man I love, not asking how to obtain the lifestyle. I cannot change my orientation. Believe me, I tried

    • You said this dreaming about it>>>> I want to have threesomes, a female body to touch, equal treatment between all 3 of us, share a bed, maybe the woman and I could both have his children and raise them as siblings in our big family. It does not work like that and you have to get these thoughts out of your head, talk to a doc that works with people like you, if not you will just end up in bed one day with a female down the road and your guilt will crush you and your husband will find out and most men will divorce you

Most Helpful Girl

  • Don't get married.

    You will do yourself an even bigger injustice if you do.

    You have the right to live the life that you want.
    But you do not have the right to lie and mislead someone else.
    I think you should be honest with your fiance.
    Tell him everything.

    You can't keep living a lie.

    Don't tell him about your wants to have threesome right away.
    First see how he accepts the news of you being bi and having urges to be with a woman.
    if he opens to the idea eventually bring up having another woman In your bed.

    You cannot keep hiding this secret and pretend that it isn't there.
    Eventually it will grow bigger than you and you will no longer be able to hide it anymore.

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What Guys Said 2

  • There's nothing immoral about that. You're being far to hard and dogmatic on yourself. The main thing is to be fully honest now, before you get married, and give him the idea that you are hetero only.

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    • Thank you for comforting me, I just don't know how or when to confront him

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    • You are very welcome. Trust that he will understand and respect your nature coming forward and making itself known again, that this is a much better thing that happens now, rather than causing all sorts of major issues later. And trust that he cares about you enough to want to see you just be happy and fulfilled in your life. You are wise to know you cannot hide your heart, and to not try to.

    • You're the best ^.^

  • Just go with your feelings and do it. there is nothing wrong with being Bi and you get the best of both worlds. just go with your feelings.

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What Girls Said 0

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