She said I need space?

Please take the time to read this... I'm really heart broken. So, I have a situation that I need helping understanding. So my older sister has this best friend who's little sister was my age. We started talking and immediately hit it off! We started FaceTimeing for hours and it seemed everything was going great. She tried visiting me to actually meet me in person but couldn't work out. So I drove down to see her. Met her parents! They were awesome and treated me as their own. I got her flowers and fudge for her family. Played guitar for her. The next morning I made her breakfast and we went for a walk on a trail. Met her sister for lunch. Saw a movie had dinner. And finished the night watching a movie and her falling asleep in my arms. The whole day she was a little flirty but then opened up during the movie. She held my hands, she rubbed my arm, and we cuddled. It was great! When I went to bed she gave me a hug and kissed me. It wasn't anything magical just a quick one. I woke up the next morning to her waking me up. I wasn't feeling well so she laid down with me and I held her till I had to go. Again she rubbed my arm and I playfully rolled her around and tickled her. Anyway when I had to leave we had another quick kiss. The whole weekend I kept my distance cause I was getting sick and wanted to get a feel for how she felt about me. A couple days later I noticed she was being kind of distant. She finally got back to me and said she didn't have enough feelings to make the long distance work. I was really upset and have more of what she said, I'm just really hurt and confused why she would lead me on like and rip my heart out. She has done distance before and she said it doesn't work for her. So then she told me she needed some space...


Most Helpful Guy

  • Relationships are already hard things, but then you add the element of distance into the equation and it makes it unbearable. The things is, you haven't been dating so already starting out with this distance is counting against you. Her reaction is typical of someone who actually likes you. But she's trying to look at it from a perspective that you won't be around, won't get to spend as much time as she feels she needs from a relationship, and unless you're willing to move down there with her, a lot of girls really don't care how much they like you, because the more they like you the harder it is on them. The situation is already in a delicate state, so I first suggest that you do give her plenty of space. Make sure she's comfortable in her space, almost to comfortable so she'll either be forced to wonder what happened to you or by the time you message her 10 days from now, she'll feel like you're someone who is worthy of her time because you didn't smother her. I know you're hurting and nothing I write can make you feel better about this. I hope you guys work it out but if not, try to find someone who is closer to you.

    • I really do like what you had to say and agree! If your up to it I have a lot of questions cause I'm still trying to figure out everything. If your cool with email.

    • Well how long do I need to give her? Till she texts me. And she said she still wants to be friends she just needs space. So is she trying to figure out her feelings? And what hurt me the most is that she said she was willing to give us a try but didn't have enough feelings to save it... Is that her just jumping ship before she got more attached to me

    • Actually you nailed it. Sometimes it's easier to run instead of sticking around to feel the brunt of hurt feelings. Wouldn't you run if you could see the future and see it's just going to cause you pain? Not that we can go to the future and do that, but she's doing it without the time machine. Making a decision that will better her situation, which doesn't involve you. I still encourage you to give her time and space. 10 days


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What Girls Said 1

  • Oh damn bro I'm sorry! All I can say about that is she obviously didn't deserve you, you seem like an awesom amazing guy and she probably hasn't grown up enough to understand somthing good when she has it. Not being mean to her she's probably not ready for a relationship girls can be bitches sometimes just keep ur head up bro u will find someone who thinks ur Amazing one day :-)


What Guys Said 1

  • Dude I don't know but for one to say directly "I don't have enough feelings for long distance" is pretty much like a brick to the face. With this I'm kind of doubting you should continue on with it, since obviously she's not into you as much as you are into her.