So i know this guy through mutual friends. We've been hanging out recently and we decided to do the whole friend with benefits thing. We went into this only wanting sex from each other. But of course, one of us has developed real feelings for the other... And that would be me.
I'm head over heels for him. There's something different about our "relationship" though. We don't just contact each other for sex. He'll invite me to lunch or invite me over and cook me dinner. When i stay over his house for the night, which is often, he always cuddles me. Like tightly and real close to me regardless if we have sex or not he will always cuddle me. Even when we greet each other he hugs me or kisses me and he will always kiss me goodbye. He's introduced me to his friend's as well.
My questions are:
• are we dating?
• how do i tell him how i feel without scaring him away?
• when we are watching TV or a movie he will point out the hot girls on there. He also speaks about past sex experiences he's had when with mutual friends. Why?
• is it OK for me to ask him if he is talking or sleeping with anyone else?
Most Helpful Guy
I'd buy you lunch too if I was getting some play on the side. But onto the real questions:
• Are we dating?
-I wouldn't count on it man; or count on him adopting that label anyways. Whenever a guy can get some and not have to label it the circumstances are in his favor. Then he always has the option to chase after someone else without technically being in a relationship.
• How do I tell him how I feel without scaring him away?
-This one I really can't help with. My approach would be to get really drunk, get laid, then kind of work it in as pillow talk after. Then you can gauge his reaction. If he gets spooked you can always blame it on the alcohol. If he's into you and says so then bam you've got your answer. Not the most ethical approach but it gives you a bit of an "out" should you not get the answer you're fishing for.
• When we are watching TV or a movie he will point out the hot girls on there. He also speaks about past sex experiences he's had when with mutual friends. Why?
-Well technically you are just friends with benefits. I talk about my past conquests with friends. It's just a layer of comfort really; you're not my girlfriend so I can tell you whatever and it doesn't matter. There is no fear of upsetting you or damaging a relationship. Truth be told it's probably a play to gauge your reaction. See if you're cool with it or if you squalk at the idea of me looking at other girls.
• Is it OK for me to ask him if he is talking or sleeping with anyone else?
-Sure I would if I was sexually active with someone. STD's are not joke; they'll wreck your life.0