Guys, am I in the wrong for breaking up with him? I know the problem isn't me but am I being to straight forward?

Main topic: works long hours and he has a toddler. We've known each other for about ten years now. When we broke up the first time after high school he got a girl pregnant. Currently they are not together. But she talks to him like he's going behind her back lieng to her about what he's doing. That right there is a red flag.. He tells me he wants to be with me, not her. Its kinda hard to believe sometimes. He does work long hours at his work and I completely understand that but when its time with me he lags and expects me to wait around. Example the other day he textd me goodmorning and he wanted to eat breakfast somewhere. I called him and said that that's a good idea. Well, we live thirty min away from each other and this was around ten in the morning so we had time to eat before he picks up his son from the baby mama. He told me he's going to change, and head to a store and hell call me when he's on his way. In my mind he sounded like it was going to be within the hour so I got dressed.. From 10 to 12 in the afternoon I texts him asking where he was and he said he fell back asleep.

Little things like that annoy the crap out of me. We barely see eachother as it is. I understand he works hard and long hours but why is it we only see each other when he gets his son. He passes out and doesn't tell me he's going to bed. His timing with everything annoys the shit out me me. Am I in the wrong?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • "But she talks to him like he's going behind her back lieng to her about what he's doing. "

    ^if he got her pregnant then they've got a kid together so i guess they r supposed to stay in contact... no?

    "He tells me he wants to be with me, not her."

    ^true. y should he lie? reason he's still seein her's dat they've got a kid together... but he likes u i believe.

    "From 10 to 12 in the afternoon I texts him asking where he was and he said he fell back asleep. "

    ^this MAYBE could be an xcuse... unless he had a very busy day da other day... and today he crashed.

    "Little things like that annoy the crap out of me. We barely see eachother as it is. I understand he works hard and long hours but why is it we only see each other when he gets his son. He passes out and doesn't tell me he's going to bed. His timing with everything annoys the shit out me me. Am I in the wrong? "

    ^nope but u should understand he has a job and a kid... those things consume lots of time... maybe it benefits him schedule-wise to see each other when he gets his son. he doesn't ignore u totally... right?

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What Guys Said 4

  • No, you aren't in the wrong at all. That story about falling asleep after you had made plans to meet is a total dealbreaker and raises serious questions about his capacity for basic human empathy, let alone kindness and politeness. It's such a bad reflection on who he is as a person that you have to hope he was lying, and just covering up for something really ineptly; that would be better in a way than if he were telling the truth, and were just your garden-variety jerk.

    Sorry about the situation. I feel even more sorry for the baby. I can't see a happy future here for you truth be told, unless by some miracle he were to get his act together. Good luck. :)

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  • No, you're not wrong. Who the effects needs all that drama? Walk cause this guy ain't what u r looking for.

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  • You're clearly 3@ in this relationship. He maybe a good man, but
    he isn't making you a priority. The very reason people don't want
    to date single parents is what is happening to you. You're not wrong.
    Leave him and find somebody who can spend good, quality time.
    Not someone who you will never be a priority. Why be second best when you don't have to.

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  • No, you just need to be true to yourself that's not the life you want.

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