Is it ever okay to date your best friend's ex?

Let's say that your friend broke up with their partner after an argument, and deep down you are happy about this. You finally get to have the person of your dreams. As you approach them, something stops you. This is your best friend's ex. Should you go for them, or are they off limits?

  • Yes, it's ok to date your best friend's ex.
    14% (5)5% (1)11% (6)Vote
  • No, it is not ok to date your best friend's ex.
    60% (21)41% (9)53% (30)Vote
  • It depends on the break up and other factors.
    17% (6)23% (5)19% (11)Vote
  • Maybe, if they are okay with it.
    6% (2)31% (7)16% (9)Vote
  • Other.
    3% (1)0% (0)1% (1)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy
Updates:
Just a random thought because it is 5 am here and I'm still awake.
Also this happened before... One of my former friend's dated my other friend's ex and yeah... They got jealous and they fell out in the most horrible way possible. So to me, it's not okay.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • it depends on how yer friend feels

    i mean some people might feel betrayed if their friend dated their X... whilst others wouldn't care.

    personally i belong to da 2nd category... i'd not care... if they like each other then i've gotta shut up :|

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Most Helpful Girl

  • This is a severely sensitive area. There is a lot of grey area on this issue. I've actually been in this situation, and it can get ugly!

    My first boyfriend and I dated for 6 months. Everything was good, at least I thought. And because he was my first boyfriend, I fell really hard. This made the break up even harder.

    It also didn't help that my ex kept coming back saying he wanted to be with me.

    He dated several girls after me, but then my ex and my bff got really close. I didn't know it was happening until I 'accidentally' (and I use that term loosely cuz I'm not exactly sure still if it was an accident or not!) found out on MSN (from an MSN status... this is how long ago this was lol).

    Anyway, my bff and my ex started dating secretly. This showed me that my bff knew it was wrong and decided to do it anyway. She started seeing him and then she thought I was stupid. She made these statuses that were acronyms for his name. (ie. If his name was Ben her status would be "beetles eating nutritiously <3<3<3") So anyway I found out because one day she posted his name with hearts, and I was all confused and she was all "I don't care about how you feel". So we stopped being friends. She was being very selfish and she later admitted to her wrong doing.

    Anyway, it can really break a friendship. Unless it was mutual and both people just fell out of the relationship and wanted out, then I can see that working. Or if it was someone they had dated in elementary school and it was no big deal.

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What Guys Said 5

  • No, because it can ruin a friendship with the best friend, and the ex boyfriend can go back with her there tons of reasons that is wrong

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  • I personally think it's okay if the breakup is unrelated to you, is initiated by your best friend instead of her ex, and you spoke with your best friend about it, then it's okay.

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  • Not if you want to stay friends with your best friend

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  • I voted D. It totally depends on if u get her blessing or not.

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  • Only if you ask them and they are ok with it.

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What Girls Said 17

  • Maybe if you were in some kind of cliche chick flick. (Mean girls cough).
    I mean your friend and the guy broke up, I think you should ask for your friend's approval though bc she may still not be over him and I think it would be a bit rude to your friend to chase after a guy who like broke up with her and she's still sad about. But lets say your best friend broke up with him and she's over him but you like him- I think you should go for it, your bff shouldn't control your love life and once again she doesn't like him.
    But lets say the guy was an ass hole to her so she had to break up with him, thats also wrong. So I think its only acceptable if your bff is over him (real friends want you to be happy).

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  • It varies for different people. Some people might be okay with it, some not. It also depends on how accepting will your best friend be.

    For me, it's never okay to date my best friend's ex. It's like a code that we'd understand naturally - DO NOT ever date your best friend's exes, no matter who was the one that dumped the other one. I'd feel awkward even talking to my best friend's ex lol what more dating him.

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  • I would normally say it's off limits, but I'm currently dating my best friend's ex. With her blessing and now that she's married to someone else and a lot of time has passed. But it made both of us (me and my boyfriend) just a little bit uncomfortable at first.

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  • Mm... it depends. If they obviously don't have feelings for each other (and I mean it's completely obvious that they don't see each other as anything other than a friend) then go for it, but otherwise I think you should ask them first maybe and see how they feel?

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  • No, it's not okay to date your best friend's ex. I would never date him, simply because I know it will make things really awkwad for my bestie. No, matter who dumped who, it's still a sensitive subject. I don't want to ruin our friendship, nope.

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  • I would not do this.. specially if she is my best friend..

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  • No it would never be okay. Even if you ask your best friend if it's okay and she says yes it's still not okay. She will no longer be able to trust you again since you will now be dating someone that she used to be close to

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  • I don't think its ok even if they are fine with it. Find someone else leave your bff's leftovers alone.

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  • Voted for the B.
    No, friendship is more important in this case I think.

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  • No it's not ok to date your bestfriends ex. If you ask them and their ok with it, then you can date them.

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  • Depends on how the friend feels & how long ago the breakup was.

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  • It's never okay

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  • I'm in this situation. I've said no to him even though we have strong feelings for each other. We probably always will. I can't do it though because my friend dated him. He and I knew each other long before they dated. I liked him but I didn't think he would like me. It turned out he did but he thought I wasn't interested. She met him through me. She asked him out and he figured since I wasn't interested, he'd move on. They dated for about six months. The two no longer talk but we do since we've always been friends. It's hard. I've been dating other guys to get over him but I'm still in love with him. He won't date at all. He wants me. I'm hoping we will both move on eventually and just see each other as friend's.

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  • Okay, I was that girl. I met my current boyfriend and instantly fell for him. He was secretly dating one of my close friends. They both kept it a secret, but I found out after I was attracted. I ignored my attraction and just became great friends with him. He was also drawn to me, but also suppressed it (I found this out way later). So he became a really close friend and I dated other people. Then her and him stopped seeing each other and she cheated on him multiple times. I waited an entire year after they broke up and finally... I just could not stay away. We have now been together for a little over 5 years. We are so happy and perfect for each other. But I also lost that friend. Turns out she wasn't such a great friend in the first place anyways.

    You cannot choose who you fall in love with. If you are great together, why not pursue it?

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  • No i wouldn't even consider it. Personally, i put it in the same category as cheating with a friends boyfriend. I have boundaries within every relationship. This is one i would never cross.

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  • NEVER! Its never ok, trust me, I had a friend do that once, and I was broken since I wasn't over him (we literally broke up 2 weeks before she started dating him) I felt betrayed by her, and yeah we aren't friends anymore...

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  • Don't ever do that

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