This question has been bugging me for a while.
Well, I'm a 28 year old woman who cannot find someone to date to save her life.
My friends say it's because I'm intimidating. I have a great career (I do, I get to do what I love for a living--write.), I worked my butt off to get to where I am, and they think I'm beautiful.
Don't ask me. Like most women, my self-esteem is wayyyy below the crust of the Earth. Probably has to do with the whole no-dating thing :p
Men don't come up to me at all. Not in the gym, not at parties, no where. Which confuses me, because how can a guy be intimidated by little me (I'm 5' 2") if he doesn't even know anything about me? (My friends had an answer for this too--of course they did LOL they say I walk and talk with extreme confidence and that also intimidates guys. At this point it sounds to me like they're just coming up with excuse after excuse.)
I used to have a love life. Back when I was the aggressive one and always went after what I wanted. But, see, I'm no longer interested in doing that. I'm almost 30 and it's gotten old. Guys have no idea how sexy it is when they go after the girl they want. I'm ready for someone to pursue me instead of me having to pursue them.
So back to my question: can an "attractive", successful woman really scare ALL of you away?
I don't think so. At all. I, like almost anyone in my position would, feel that there's really something about me that is so unattractive that men just don't bother, but I figured I'd ask the question out of curiosity.
- Yes, we get intimidated easy.40% (21)
- No, the problem is really you.60% (32)
Most Helpful Guy
There is much more to this.
First of all, 3rd wave feminism are ruining gender relations.
It's almost a felony to approach a woman.
Given a guy is in bad luck, if she doesn't like you, we're not just doing an approach... we're committing sexual assault or harassment.
Second... it's not that guys are intimidated by independent women.
They just don't appeal to us... let me explain.
You see, we like women because they're different from us - we like you for everything we're not.
Yes... we like that you're feminine.
But women can't seem to put down the independence girl power trip in the relationship, and stop acting like men.
And really... we don't want to measure dicks and compete with our girlfriends... we do that with out guy friends and our boss.
Now why would we want to do that all the time?
The more you're like men, the less you appeal to us.
Switch it around, and you'll see the logic... you don't want a man who's more like a woman either.
I'm not saying 'be submissive', that's not what it's about.
It's about you being feminine, and letting us be masculine so we feel like men, who in turn can treat you like the amazing feminine woman you are.