Should I leave him or should I stay? (older more experienced women/men please)?

I am 30 years old and I have been in a relationship for 3 months. This guy is a nice guy but things he does seems to annoy me. I don't know why. I am not sure if it is because I am just incapable of loving another person or he is the problem.
Let me give you some background information on myself. I have never been in a serious relationship, never been in love, and never had a BFF. I am kind of a loner. I mean i would like to have someone close to share my ideas and dreams with but it just has never happened. I can come off as a bit standoffish. I am very quiet. I do want to be married and have kids but I am wondering why I am having so much trouble finding the one. Am I even capable of being in a relationship with another person. Am I crazy? Do i need to check myself into a psych clinic? lol

Here is some background data on him: He is 39, and wants the same things as me. Marriage, kids , etc. He is very nice and a gentleman. However, he does seem to have a very low sex drive, and be very boring. He is currently unemployed only working on a side martial arts business. However, he only teaches classes 4.5 hours out of week. Most of the other time... I am not totally sure what he does. He used to be a clinical psychiatric counselor but he was fired 3 years ago. He hasn't really been looking for work which kind of bothers me.

Okay so again we have been dating for 3 months. I get annoyed at the following things he does:

1. He is very messy. I mean disgusting. I refuse to shower in the master bathroom because the tub is filled with dirt, stains, and body hair. His kitchen has knats and all kinds of creatures living in it because he hasn't cleaned or did the dishes in years. I mean it is nasty. It is a beautiful home but very unkept. I have repeatedly hinted n

Updates:
ok well it cutt off most of my question

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Well if seen girls in your situation

    From what I know, the ones that haven't really love and there older like yourself, they almost always have a bitter side to them. And sometimes there not as sweet as a women who once did love... but that's generalizing and may not be true with you. Just has been my experience... but in contrast when they do find someone they like, they tend to like them A LOT

    About him, well I think his lifestyle doesn't suit yours and you need to decide if it's something your ok with or not.

    I think overall your simply with a guy that you don't really want to be with. But since your 30 you may feel time is against you so your giving it a shot.

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    • Only thing I am mad about is that I keep meeting guys like this.

    • Well all you have to do is approach men that are not this way and if they are move on to the next

      It's that simple... right?

Most Helpful Girl

What Guys Said 1

  • What are you doing with this guy? He's a mess. No real job, doesn't sound like he's looking for one, too lazy to keep house, and he doesn't satisfy you sexually. It sounds like he's depressed but he's not even close to being able to being a partner to you let alone a responsible father to children. He needs to check himself into a psych clinic. You need to get out more, meet some better guys. Maybe try online dating to meet some shy guy who has his life together.

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    • I have tried online dating for the last 10 years and this is what i got

What Girls Said 2

  • Time to move on. If that many things bother you about him he is not worth your time. I know it seems like you want to stay with them because there might be some potential, but in the end it's not worth if. You know your worth and what you deserve. You will find the right guy for you with time. You might need to put a little work in yourself though. I used to consider myself a loner until I decided I wanted friends and a boyfriend. I joined a bunch of clubs at my university and started volunteering on a regular basis. I ended up meeting a lot of amazing people with time, but I definitely had to step out of my comfort zone.

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  • Leave him now.

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