Would you be mad if your boyfriend or girlfriend had a sexy picture of a ex on their phone?

My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 6 months and A few weeks ago I found a picture of a girl he dated last year. But It wasn't your average picture. She was in his bed with her pants down. You couldn't see anything but the thought is still there. I didn't say anything but I deleted it. I just hoped he forgot about the picture. But now he reactivated his Facebook and he told me to add him. And again there is a picture of this girl in one of the profile pictures. I'm a little annoyed and trying to figure out if I'm over reacting. Hopefully someone can help me and give good advice!

Updates:
Ps - I know that it was wrong of me to delete the picture but I was shocked and didn't know what to do. Not that it makes it right but I just didn't except to see an ex there.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Yes, you had every right to be mad, but you handled it the wrong way.
    You should have talked to him about it not gone behind his back, invade his privacy and delete his pictures.

    Now how will he know what you're mad about when you just do everything without his knowing.

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    • I agree that it probably wasn't the best way to handle it but I was afraid of getting into an argument.

    • You can't be afraid to fight for your relationship. It's always better to be upfront with your partner.

      For all we know, he honestly didn't even know he still had the picture seeing how it was from an old relationship. Not everyone sweeps through their phone to delete old pictures.

    • Thanks for MH!

What Guys Said 4

  • I would be mad if a girlfriend got into my phone and deleted pictures. You have a problem with pictures he has, discuss it with him. Don't go "cleaning his house".

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    • I didn't want to cause problems in my relationship over an ex girlfriend. And for the record I didn't sneak through his phone. He was right next to me playing video games while I went through it and didn't care.

    • You could cause lots of problems by deleting pictures he has. And for the record, I did not even suggest that you did any sneaking.

  • Pantless pic - ok to be upset.
    Deleting pantless pic - you crossed the line.
    Getting upset at old facebook profile pic - not ok to be upset.

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    • I know it was wrong. I can admit. I just didn't know what to do because I was shocked to see it there.

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    • Okay try to think about it if you were in my place and you found the picture. It was wrong to delete it yes but if my relationship ended I'd delete the pictures in my phone because that's what people do to move on. And because of the Facebook picture that must mean there was more then with one picture to be deleted. But the pants off picture was still there.
      Maybe Ill just not say anything to him... Because I don't want him to hate me over it.

    • Two things. As a general rule, if you make a mistake (which you did), it's always much better to own up to it early than to let it sit around for the other person to find out. If he figures out what you did on his own somehow, then imagine how crazy you'd seem from his perspective, and how he would start thinking about what other little things he doesn't know about that you do to manipulate his life?

      Secondly, I don't see a big deal with the facebook pic at all. It was part of his life at one point, and it doesn't affect his actions nor his feelings now. It's true, there is a small chance that he still might have feelings for her, but that only says two things about him that are both good for you - 1. he has the potential to have the same or even stronger feelings for you, and 2, you know who the target is and can keep an eye out for the threat. Isn't it better to know where the threat might come from, than not?

  • You have every right to be upset. You have to confront him about it though. Don't stay quiet

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    • But he's going to be mad that I deleted the picture on his phone...

    • I don't know how to confront him.

    • Just say something along the lines of "I'm sorry but I deleted this picture on your phone. It was a dirty pic of your ex. Can you explain why you still have it?"

  • If you need advice, then throw this guy. He's a goner and betray you sooner or later.

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What Girls Said 9

  • Well considering you have only been together for 6 months, It would depend how deep in his camera roll the picture was taken. Ofcourse we all forget to delete pictures, but I wouldn't worry too much about it. You deleted it and that was that, if he goes and looks for it I would wonder why.. as for the whole Facebook thing, he just reactivated it, he probably didn't think much about it, I know if I reactivate mine, my profile picture is of me and my ex. You aren't over reacting, because you haven't made any irrational arguments with him, try to let it go but see if he deletes it. Honestly though I still have pictures of my ex's on social media because I'm not really fussed xx

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  • I wouldn't be happy for sure, it would hurt me. I don't think you're overreacting because most of people would be annoyed. But maybe he just forgot about it. The same goes with the fb pictures. I think he just doesn't give much importance to it, so you shouldn't be worried. Especially because it's an old picture that he posted years ago.
    I understand why you just deleted it and didn't told him anything, but if you keep feeling uncomfortable about the pic he had on the phone, I think you should talk with him and say how you feel. If you talk with him, maybe he will show you that it doesn't mean anything and that it wasn't important for him.

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  • How did you find the picture? Were you snooping? How old was it? Like, is it just an old pic he never bothered deleting or was it sent to him recently? If it's old, he's probably forgotten about it.

    As for the facebook pic if it's just an old pic he didn't delete then it's no biggie but if it's still set as his profile pic I'd ask him to change it. Could be he just doesn't really pay attention to fb and didn't even realize his profile pic was still one with her.

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    • The problem is he had enough time to change his profile picture and edit the profile but never deleted her picture.

    • You said he just reactivated it... he's obviously not that active on Facebook and probably hasn't even bothered going through old pics because he doesn't think it's important.

      My boyfriend and I have been together for 7 months and he's still got old pics with his ex in his tagged photos.

  • Oh no, I'd be pretty pissed too. There's no reason to keep sexy pics of someone who is no longer your lover.

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  • Yes I would

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  • Yeah I would not like that at all. I never keep pictures of my exes, especially ones from a year ago. Just because the picture was there though did not mean that he was looking at it. He may have simply just forgot about it.

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    • Yeah that's what I thought too but now that he added me on Facebook and a picture of two of them are there it bothers me more. It's like a slap to the face but I don't know how to talk with him about it either.

  • he may have forgot, just ask him to delete it, his reaction will tell you.

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  • i wouldn't like that

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  • I seriously think you should talk to him about it. And yes, I'd be very mad.

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