Why do individuals cheat when the "CLAIM" to love someone?

please give me some insight how that works.. at all.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Because commiting and being loyal is a decision and some simply can't stand behind their decisions.

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    • That's what I believe also... if one can't be loyal and commit what's the point of being a part of the relationship... if you can't then just spare someone the heartache and hurt and don't say you love them... Give them happiness... and joy... only to crush it, destroy it all because YOU can't be loyal.

What Guys Said 12

  • You don't have to find the logic to an asshole's decision.
    If they cheated they didn't love that person. Period.

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    • i comprehend that logic... i just dont accept it... for i have been loyal for 4 years and i intend to keep that loyalty 10..20.. even 50 years from now... why can't oher individuals do that.

    • I ask myself the same question: why?
      I also intend to stay faithful forever, I don't plan on cheating on any of my future gfs, and haven't done it in the past either.

    • thats great, i wishmost guys thought like that... with their actual brain and not with the little one

  • You never cheat on the one you love. It's not possible, cheating is a choice and not a mistake. If they cheated on the love means they never really loved the person in the first place, simple.

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  • Simple, it's because they're lying when they say they love that specific person.

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    • but some people really love someone yet can't seem to BE with that one person in body as they are in spirit.. why is that?

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    • i understand what your intents are... but it does not justify the action... no secret is hidden forever sooner or later it will blow up in your face and you are going to start reminiscing on how you regret your choice and actions and i you wish you could take it back... but why not save you-self the trouble and just not do it.

    • I agree with you.

  • Some people don't settle down and play the field and cheating to them is as much no big deal as it is part of the thrill. When you date serially and have a lot of different sex partners, One thing that can happen is the thrill of something new, Some guys just forget they are still in a relationship. It becomes habitual and maybe they hope to get caught or not care if they do , Self centered and uncaring.

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  • (barring the thrill of having an affair and sex with others) ... the notion that one must love somebody and therefore cannot love another one, is a false societal assertion, based on traditional beliefs. A person can love more than one person equally. Need proof? I mother doesn't reject her one child over the other. She loves them equally. The notion that love is split is bull. You can love, and people do fall in love, with different people at the same time.

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    • you can't use the love between mother and child to justify the lack of commitment that is cheating.

    • Oh yes I can compare. I never justified it though, I gave the answer to your "why". Its a truth... a person can cheat yet still love you. That's why it happens and I explained why. The mothers love is a different love, but love nevertheless. Its proof that love doesn't have to be diluted or "split" between people. You can love 2 people equally. But yeah, I know, its shit that somebody betrays your trust. If a person says he is committed to one, he must honor it and be strait up if he doesn't want to.

    • i understand your logic... thank you

  • Because love and sex are 2 separate concepts.
    You can have sex with person A but not develop feelings while still loving person B.
    It is just a sexual release.

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    • Love and sex might be different concepts but when in a relationship they are one and the same. If the person you are with cannot satisfy your sexual need... doesn't mean you have the right to go behind their backs to do it with someone else... they have the right to know when things are not going how you would like... and discuss whether the relationship needs to end or progress.

    • I somewhat agree that is why I prefer polyamorous relationships since that way everyone is aware about who is sleeping with whom. However I disagree that love and sex morph into one when in a relationship. There are many types of love but I will focus on the 2 main one's physical and emotional. Sex is a physical act between two individuals involving stimulation of the genital organs. It fulfils a basic urge which allows a man or woman to ejaculate. The emotions behind the act are a social construct and not a natural occurrence.
      Loving someone's personality is just another form of attraction. If you have friends (which I'm hoping you do) you will notice that there are personality traits that you like about them, maybe even love about them. Whether it be their sense of humour, confidence, intellect and e. t. c. However you would never date them because they are either of the same-sex or you friend-zoned them for one of many possible reasons.

  • They cheat cause they think the grass is always greener on the other side ,

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  • Easy

    A cunt will act like a cunt... no matter what they say or claim.

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  • Love is a chemical reaction. You can cheat and still have a chemical reaction.

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  • You don't have to love someone to want to sleep with them, if you think you won't get caught, some will cheat even if they love their partner

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    • but is connecting with someone or being interested in enough to make you not want to break their hearts... to avoid causing them pain and making them cry?

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    • I didn't say it justified the action, but people do cheat, I am just telling you why. It certainly can be hidden forever, there is a good chance they will be found out though.

    • the caused pain is what i dont understand... you know they will be hurt, but still continue on doing it for years sometimes and when it comes out they act like they are he victims... asking for forgiveness and to be taken back.. its just Hippocratic in my eyes.

  • Men may cheat for purely physical reasons, no emotions involved. Still love the wife, just had to have sex.

    Women cheat usually for emotional reasons, so it tends to be more serious and fatal for the relationship because she was actively seeking to emotionally replace her husband.

    So your question simply reveals female bias and lack of understanding of the opposite sex.

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    • but why cheat for physical reason... for sex.. when you have a perfectly sexual partner whom you can have sex with... someone to provide a release of that sexual need... why not to avoid unnecessarily hurting someone just dont get in any serious relationship.

    • Because quite often, women either decrease the frequency of sex or stop having sex with their partner. Or she isn't into the type of sex he likes, but the relationship is otherwise good and he doesn't want to sacrifice the relationship over something as silly as sex, so he fucks someone else.

    • AS A WOMAN... we sometimes like to try new things but are not sure if our partner are up for it so we wait for them to make the first move... we wait and that is not usually the best thing to do but we do it to see how interested they are in us... and if they don't make a move we end up feeling rejected and undesirable... keep in mind its not the case with every of women... we want the attention given in the beginning to stay becasue if its gone than we feel the feeling or interest has gone with it.

  • I could definitely love someone and still have sex with someone else. I would cheat though, as in lie about it or do something behind their back. Love is a feeling I give, it doesn't mean you own me.

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    • thing is... it doesn't work like that when you say "I love you" that indicates you have given you-self completely to that person... because now they have become a part of you that you cherish, adore, and trust... they give you their heart and soul.. and when you make a decision to violate that trust you shatter that person from the inside out.

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    • I get yours, my problem is with the word you use to describe it. I don't think it's love properly speaking. I know women are loathe to admit it but when they compare it to true love, the love they feel for their children say, you can see it's not love it's possessiveness.

    • OKAY.. i'll give you that one... but know its my opinion and personal feelings towards this situation that made me choose these words to describe it.

What Girls Said 6

  • Because people at times get selfish. They may feel they genuinely care about the person they are with, but they get selfish when they realize that they have a need (or think) that isn't being met, so they go outside of the relationship. In truth, it's super uncool and people do this when they don't feel like working on the relationship but they don't want to abandon the benefits of the relationship.

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  • It's possible to love someone and develop feelings for another. A person in a perfectly healthy relationship wouldn't cheat, but someone whose relationship is suffering is more likely to cheat, even if they do still love their current partner. For some people, sex is an escape. It's difficult to understand why cheaters do what they do, but after watching what my mom and stepdad went through, I've come to understand that you can betray someone even if you love them. And it tears you apart.

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    • I'm sorry about your mother... my opinion is whomever committed the betrayal does not truly love the one he/she claims to love... not with all their being... heart and soul... cause love like that is complete and full.

  • Some people are greedy. They want to have sex with other people while still being able to keep their current partner.

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  • Selfish self-centered people will LIE to get any & everything that they want, while disregarding how their actions are affecting others.

    When you actually love someone, you will stay committed to them & avoid anything at all costs that would harm them.

    Love does not hurt.

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  • They lack willpower. But that doesn't mean they don't have feelings for the other person.

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  • they dont really love them.

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    • is that and opinion or a fact. because my father cheats on my mother all he time yet he still says he loves her... he even cheats his own children and sill claim to love us... why?

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