Girls, do I sound like a guy you'd like to date? How significant is this downfall?

(First off Im into good smart girls) I've never had a girlfriend, not even close, so I don't know if girls like me. For the physical side I am 6'1" 16 years old. I am lean and pretty muscular. I think I have a good looking face but mainly when my hair is fixed. My hair is dirty blond and normal length for a guy. Now mentally/emotionally I am a very nice guy, respectful, good morals. I am a strong Christian, go to church on Sunday, listen to KLove and stuff. I'm very smart and near the top of my class with a 4.225 cumulative GPA and raising. So I think I'm good looking and nice and stuff. So I know that's a plus. But I know girls are attracted to confidence. That is something I don't have. I've never approached a girl just to talk to her or to get to know her, barely talk to girls really or people in general. I was diagnosed with selective mutism at a young age, but gotten much better. I am still EXTREMELY shy. Sometimes I don't talk to my friends because I'm uncomfortable. People/decent amount of girls at least know who I am. So I have some friends and people that know me. The thing is I just don't ever talk much primarily to girls. I just feel like I'll be bugging them or theyll not like me and laugh on the inside or think Im weird or creepy. I don't ever hang out with my friends outside school except one sometimes, another one rarely. I feel like an annoyance and feel they wouldn't wanna hang out I don't know why. I don't even have my second best friends phone number. So I'm not social or confident, awkward around people and suck at conversation with girls and a lot of guys. But i do open up to most people once i know them. How big of a downfall is this in the dating game? I feel like everything is almost perfect for me except social skills, probably the most important. I just wait for girls to approach me. That never happens and my big crush is shy. Am I a guy you'd be interested in? Be honest I take no offense. And if you respond, what type of girl are you?

  • Yes
    62% (10)
  • No
    6% (1)
  • Maybe
    32% (5)
And you are? I'm a GirlGuys can not vote on this poll

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10

Most Helpful Girl

  • The shyness thing you shouldn't worry about too much. You're still very young so there's every chance you'll gain more confidence as you get older and be able to have friends who are girls which should make it easier talking to girls you like. I'm shy too so I reckon I can relate better to shyer guys, especially introverts (people who need alone time to get their energy, as opposed to extroverts who get energy from hanging out with groups) 'cause I am one myself :') , and I'm way more comfortable one-on-one. Also never having a girlfriend? Dude you're 16; I've never been in a relationship (not one I count anyway..) and I'm nearly 20 :')

    For me personally I wouldn't date you because of the age difference and also if you're a really strong Christian I think our worldviews would be too different (not that it isn't cool to be a Christian and everything it's just I'm not and a lot of my beliefs are quite different so I feel like it'd be a barrier)

    There will be girls who like you though. I know maybe it seems right now like everyone you know is hooking up and you're left out, but trust me, you're far from being the only one. Hard advice to follow maybe; but you really just need to relax about the idea of having a girlfriend until there's someone you're really into.

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What Girls Said 9

  • Yeah, you sound almost exactly like the kind of guy I'd go for. I can't speak for anybody else, but I always found shyness to be adorable. Confidence, when it comes to people I would date, would honestly kind of intimidate me. So pretty much what you're viewing as a downfall is pretty awesome to me.

    As for what kind of girl I am. . . In all honesty, I'm not a very good person. I used to be, but things changed. Over the years, most of my friendships have faded out and I'm not sure why, and I've only come to resent my parents and siblings. As I result, I just ended up cynical and bitter, with pretty bad trust issues. I push people away because I figure they're going to leave anyway, just like everyone else. I wouldn't really consider myself emotionally stable either. I somehow manage to be insecure and arrogant at the same time. Like you, I don't really hang out with people outside of school, and always in the back of my mind think I'm bothering people. I only have a couple people I text, normally just my best friend. To top off all my negatives, I'm not that good-looking, and I'm sex-repulsed, which as you can probably imagine would be a massive problem for most guys.

    Aside from all that shit, I'm a writer. I want to be an author, and other than that I write poetry, my way of venting emotions I'm not open about. Music-wise I'm into a combination of rock and rap, but I'll listen to anything that has meaning to me. My favorite band is Hollywood Undead, sticking to their more meaningful songs, and not so much the immature ones. I like video games, although I don't play as much as I used to, particularly the Elder Scrolls series and anything I can find that's kind of philosophical. I'm generally pretty shy and the type of person who would take it slow in any sort of relationship, especially romantic. As states above, I'm sex-repulsed, so I don't exactly have high hopes for one, though. I'm incredibly honest, trustworthy, and loyal, although I'm not sure those traits will ever be enough to make for all of my downfalls.

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  • I can relate so much. Well, I could since it's gotten better than before. Try telling a joke, anecdote or talk about something that you find interesting. When you come across someone you want to talk to, you can start a conversation with something simple like "hey, [name] did you do the math homework?" or "what did you think of the test?". But the key is to just try to relax (easier said than done), they are just humans. When someone jokes with you try to not take it to heart, they probably aren't trying to be mean, joke back or laugh. If someone invites you to go somewhere, go. Afterwards you will feel more accomplished and if you get tired, you can always leave early. Interacting with others is hard, but being nice and smiling can get you a long way.

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  • You sound like the sort of guy I'd really like once I got to know you, but someone I probably would never get to know 'cause you're so socially reserved.

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  • Tomboy
    Brown hair pixie cut
    Blue eyes
    Small mouth but full lips
    Basketball player
    Average weight ( more arme muscles )
    Shy
    Not confident
    16 years old

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  • Well, technically no I couldn't date you until you were 18, but let's just say there's a guy the same age hypothetically.
    I am shy, but I tend to warm up to people kind of quick. I am intelligent (graduated early with honors and already have my Bachelor's degree). I'm not a religious person but I also don't mind it. So if I met a guy like you, I think I could come up with fun ideas for dates, and run them by the guy.

    If he doesn't talk much it's ok as long as he smiles, so I know he's having a good time (like go karts, mini gold, a concert, etc). I'm patient, and would hope with time he got comfortable enough around me so he could express himself a bit easier. Even though I'm shy, I have asked a few guys out before. :)

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  • You sound like you're kind of the guy version of me except I'm a bit less shy, mainly really introverted and awkward in groups. And of course not nearly as smart ( ._.), even though I have no Idea how PTA scores work the Dutch system is really different, yours looks quite high? But uhm, yes I would definitely consider approaching/dating you if I met you. Maybe just try to get close to a girl you like, perhaps through another (guy) friend? Just to get comfortable, really we're not that strange.

    Besides not everybody get's a girlfriend/boyfriend at a young age it's good to be able to be your own person. I'm sure you'll end up Peachy keen, don't worry to much.

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  • too long; didn't read

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  • Maybe I would.

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  • I voted yes, but if I was younger and single.

    Confidence can come with experience and age. You're under 18 so give yourself some time. If the girl you meet is the right one for you things will probably just fall into place. :)

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