How do you tell the difference if you are in love or infatuated?

How do you know that you are in love and not just infatuated with someone? I think I love my best friend but I have heard so many things that it might just be infatuation how do you tell the difference?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Infatuation is an emotion and is more selfish than love. You may or may not take action when infatuated, but it is all about your happiness, and feelings as oppose to what the other person feels or wants. If you do something for them just so they will like you, that is about your happiness and therefore is because of infatuation, and is not love.

    Love is a commitment to sacrifice, and is always expressed as action. That action can be giving time, money, or effort, but there is always a sacrifice on your part. Much like how a parent must make sacrifices for their children because of love, with no hope of reward in return. You can not love without an action. You can't love someone and then stand by and do nothing when they need your help. Action is how love is always expressed.

    It feels good be be infatuated, but it feels good to be loved. Actually being in love often just feels like work in an thankful job, again much like how parents sometimes feel.

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    • amazing reply Mr anonymous , you said a lot in 3 short paragraghs. you summarized what would have taken me 5 pages, I would give you the credit if we new your name, as I feel like posting it on facebook and giving anonymous the credit

    • first name and last initial and your home town, would help as I will make like a poster and give John D from El paso credit as an example , if you know what I mean

    • I really like this one:
      Love is a commitment to sacrifice, and is always expressed as action. That action can be giving time, money, or effort, but there is always a sacrifice on your part. Much like how a parent must make sacrifices for their children because of love, with no hope of reward in return. You can not love without an action. You can't love someone and then stand by and do nothing when they need your help. Action is how love is always expressed.

      It feels good be be infatuated, but it feels good to be loved. Actually being in love often just feels like work in an thankful job, again much like how parents sometimes feel.

Most Helpful Girl

  • When you're infatuated with someone, you just see an idealized version of them. You don't see the ugly parts. And what infatuation boils down to is selfish love. Let's say you're infatuated with someone who doesn't like you back. It'll hurt pretty bad but more than anything your ego will be hurt whether or not you are aware of it consciously. You don't want to see them with anyone else. That would drive you mad. But after all is said and done you aren't up all night hoping that they're doing well, thinking if that dispute they had with their mother is over, wondering if that rash on their back went away...

    Because you didn't love them. When you love someone you know their ugly parts and you love them regardless. You see who they really are. Your love isn't selfish. Even if they're dating someone else you're concerned with their happiness. Even if you've gone weeks without talking to them you are still worried about their welfare. You would do anything for them. And you know that a piece of you is going to love them forever.

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What Guys Said 10

  • Infatuation is more or less a crush. You like being around that person and thinking about them. They take up a lot of your thought but usually it's an inflated concept of who they really are (you tend to think they are great no matter what.) You are blinded to reality sometimes when you are infatuated. Eventually it quells when the person does something you don't like or when you fight with the person. Another way would be to imagine that person in a bad situation or a lot uglier and see if the feelings stay.

    Love is something that keeps going. Through good and bad, thick and thin. It doesn't go away and you see the strengths and weaknesses of the person and accept them for who they are while being supportive and trying to help make that person better and they likewise do the same. You enjoy their company no matter what you are doing, even if it is not fun. They are a companion and someone you confide in and trust. You realize the relationship will have ups and downs and cold spots but you still keep going.

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  • If you've never been in an argument with the person, it ain't love I always say.

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  • Infatuation tends to not last for many dates, good or bad. Love can surpass a lot of bad dates.

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  • If you'd be willing to sacrifice yourself for their well being. Putting their life before your own.

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  • Most best friends have a strong connection , so if you feel that towards him see what your heart says then take the risk of you think it's worth it.

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  • i personally just hope time tells the difference. do you think infatuation can last very long?

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  • Only time will tell. Do the 4 seasons together without sexual contact, and if he sticks he usually is the one.

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  • Only a woman would ask such a question:)

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  • I love everyone.

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  • if i am thinking about a girl, then this means i am attracted. if i am not able to concentrate about anything else then it is time i should talk to her. And if i am fanticizing about her sexually, her on bed... etc, then it is lust.

    I hope this may help

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What Girls Said 10

  • If the only time you enjoy being with them is when you're having sex or messing around in one way or another, you're probably infatuated. Finding many things about them to be irritating if you're just out to eat or something would be more of an infatuation, as you're not wearing those rose-coloured glasses that often come along with love.
    Love is more when you're a bit of a giddy mess just being with them. Whether it be just sitting at a beach or park, out to eat, or getting random kisses. Later on when you've been together for a while, if the best evenings are ones spent just cuddling which you're perfectly content with, it's leaning towards love.

    Not that those two will mean the same thing to everyone. Many will start with infatuation which will develop into love as they spend more time together and let them see things a bit more clearly as they let the hormones settle down a bit.

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  • If you love a person you'll love them always. If you love someone you'd be willing to die for them. If you love someone who didn't love you, no matter how badly it hurt you, you would want to see them with the person who could truly make them happy. When you love someone it's not about you, it's never about you it's about them. Love goes beyond those heart fluttering feelings for example. There will be days where you argue but in spite of that you wouldn't stop caring, if you're really mad at them and they start crying your heart would hurt for them. If you were really mad and they slipped in the rain, you would help them up instead of leaving them behind. You would still take care of them as if you were just smiling together. There where even be days where something about them just annoys you to your core, but you still want them to have happiness and if they look at you with sadness in their eyes, you'd go take care of them.

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  • Infatuation is typically something where you are unable to see flaws in a person, it comes quick and strong and is often not very rational, and will fade over time. Love is a feeling that leaves you questioning yourself, and can even hurt sometimes - but it's something you'd never give up.

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  • Infatuation is based on how s/he makes you feel, love is based on deeper planes such as respect and trust.

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  • If them leaving hurts you, that is infatuation. Real love involves you being able to be your own person at the same time. Now you can be sad that the guy has left if you are in love, but if he leaves and you have overwhelming emotions that last for a long time, you are most likely infatuated.

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  • Infatuation is being in love with your image or version of someone without accounting for their impefections. Love is accepting all of the flaws and perfection of a person.

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  • infatuation is being obsessed with the idea of them, largely because of their looks, not for who they are. it's selfish.

    being in love is loving the person for who they are, warts and all. you make sacrifices for them. it's not selfish.

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  • The easiest answer is wait. Infatuation always fades.

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  • Stalking or asking out for a date.

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  • If you love him and he does not love you back then its infatuation

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