Because I love him, should I let him sleep with another girl as long as he comes back to me at the end of the day?

As stupid as the title may seem... I actually mean it. My Boyfriend and I have been together for years. Yet, I know that I won't be able to sleep with him till we get married. Yet, I feel bad for doing this to him. I feel like he needs to sleep with someone meanwhile. I love him but i'm not a monster to completely be holding him down without having any type of sexual contact with anyone for over 8+ years. Lately, i've noticed this girl who is known for being a "Slut" and I feel like just letting him sleep with her and leave it at that. It would be like a one time thing with her and then he'd come back. It doesn't have to be her exactly but any girl. Maybe like a one night thing with a girl at a club I don't know. Does this song like a good idea?

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suggestions?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I believe that under no circumstances is it alright to cheat on your partner, even if they are alright with it. It's really nice that you want to hold up your moral standards and care about him to not want to torture him they way you feel you are, but the truth is, if he's dating you and you don't want to have sex, that's something he's going to need to level with on his own. Letting him cheat on you, I promise, will blow up in your face. Maybe not even right away, but eventually things are going to turn sour and you're going to wonder where things went wrong. There is a moral code among people that you don't sleep around if you are in love with, and when you break it, there is literally a psychological break from the person you think you're in love with. There's also the double standard. (speaking speculatively) Is he alright with you having a one night stand on him? Maybe he is, maybe he isn't. It would still be traumatizing to him. And even if you are really that much of a 'helpful' girlfriend, it's going to traumatize you. I can see from your point of view why you're thinking this way, but the only thing you're really doing wrong is proposing the wrong messed up idea rather than the logical one: get married. If you've been with him for 8 years, hell, if you've been together for 3 and you still want to be with them, you should have thought about marriage a lot time ago. If you don't want to marry him, then you need to move on so you don't compromise both your morals. And maybe you don't see it as breaking morals, but guarantee your subconscious won't let it go. We aren't coded to cheat well, that's why it always ends poorly. I did a search on the internet before writing this and there are a lot of people who thing what you're suggesting is perfectly alright. But looking at these people and why they think it's alright, most of them are on a third marriage or can't hold any stable relationship. Don't be them. You have the guy that you've grown with for 8 years. Stop torturing him, but in the correct way and just marry him.

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What Guys Said 4

  • no, if he isn't willing to wait then he isn't worth it. also it would just make everything awkward from then on

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  • No, don't do it. All it does is lead to disaster. It is an awful idea for too many reasons to list.

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  • I think... that's a horrible idea.

    I'm not religious, nor am I opposed to pre-marital sex (I've had more than most... quite a bit more, lol). But. I don't think you're thinking correctly about this.

    First off, have some self-respect.
    Second, deep down, I'm sure you want him to say no to this idea. Don't test him this way.
    Third, don't call her a slut or degrade her as something disposable.

    You would be mistreating yourself, your partner, and that girl with this idea. Don't strip away the dignity of yourself and others.

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  • That would make you a pretty damn cool girlfriend indeed!

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What Girls Said 4

  • Gosh girl NO! He could end up leaving you for her! And if he accepts your offer, that shows he's unworthy to you. It shows that he is impatient, that he can't wait for marriage. If he loves you, he won't mind waiting. He would actually be excited. Please, it will only hurt you, and it will only entertain him.

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  • Very bad idea, your relationship might get destroyed.. What if the guy feels that he can enjoy much more with her than you (guys do think a lot about sex) and if you're not ready and he knows that you've reached a mutual trust and understanding please don't break that... Also if you really feel guilty why don't you just jerk him off? You don't need to have vaginal sex there's other possibilities available too like oral, anal etc...

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  • How would you feel if he had sex with a virgin? he doesn't have to sleep with a slut.

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    • I really don't care. As long, as he gets what he wants (all guys do) I wouldn't care.

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    • Why don't YOU be the girl that gives him that then.

    • @Elises dumb nasty bitch.

  • It sounds like a terrible idea. If he really loves u he would not b game for that.

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