I was talking to my boyfriend today, and he was telling me how hot he finds blonde girls, and how they are irresistible. He also said brunettes are hot too, but that blondes are perfect. That in itself is not a problem, but I am a blasian girl with jet black hair and what he said was really hurtful to me since I fitted NONE of the descriptions of his perfect girl. It also didn't help that I found a picture of him all over this blonde girl from before we were together and even though I spoke to him about it and he apologized for what he said I still feel like I'm not good enough. Am I right to feel this way, and also how can I stop feeling like this?
- You're being unreasonableVote A
- I can see why you feel this wayVote B
Most Helpful Guy
I got to say that as a guy, there are two girls you want.
The first girl is your dream girl, the one you want to marry and live with. Its the person you find attractive and love. The first girl is a real girl, expectations are different. A guy has characteristics he looks for, short/tall, skinny/athletic/active/curvy/chubby, blonde/brunette/black/red hair. The list is long but usually pretty broad, its just to feel out the pool so to speak. Next he has a list for her behaviors and mannerisms. The first girl is a real one so she doesn't have to be perfect, she just has to be better than 7 billion other people (which to him, you are). The first girl is the best girl he could find, the pick of the litter, the first overall draft.
The second girl is different, she's a Kardashianian, if that's an adjective, and so she's fake as hell. The second girl isn't real, she's just something in his head. Her personality doesn't matter to him, her behavior doesn't matter to him, and her heart doesn't matter to him. The second girl isn't real, no guy really looks for her. The second girl is only physically attractive and nothing more. The second girl is just what he imagines to be the most perfect woman. She has the best body in his mind and maybe the best personality, but that woman doesn't matter. The second woman is useless. There is probably one haircut on a guy that you love more than any haircut on any other guy. There's a guy with your favorite abs, one with your favorite arms, one with your favorite anything. That's what the second woman is, she's just a Frankenstein girl created by every girl he's ever seen. she's less real than a Disney princess.
The first girl is the best girl, you are his first girl, and the only one that matters. The second girl is a collage of his favorites, nothing more than a highlight reel.0
Most Helpful Girl
I can understand you feeling a bit resentful. He shouldn't followed that up with how beautiful he thinks you are, or shouldn't have swooned over them like that. Under 18, though? He's young, and some guys are more immature and oblivious than others at that age. Maybe you need someone more mature..2