How open minded are you to allow your partner to flirt and/or sleep with someone else?

I just need to know if I'm the only girl who isn't crazy jealous or possessive about things like that... what's your opinions girls and guys.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I'd let her (no-contact) flirt with other guys, but not sleep with them. She is also free to flirt with women, and should feel free to sleep with them as well. That's pretty much my boundaries.

    But that's just in general. The specifics would depend on the nature of our relationship. I. e. if we were 'swingers,' of course I wouldn't object to her sleeping with another guy, as long as I got to sleep with his significant other as well. But there are only certain types of girls that I would be comfortable having this kind of relationship, and only certain types of couples that I would be comfortable "spouse swapping" with. So, it's all subjective, really..

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    • i share the same views about this matter... when my fiancee is flirting with someone else in front of me his friends get so uncomfortable thinking that i will flip out on him... so when i dont they question me... i just say that im cool with it... it takes them awhile to process it but they are getting there.

Most Helpful Girl

  • You're not a alone. There are women out there who separate love from sex and are okay with having a partner or even getting married to someone and both or one person continues to have sex with others. Relationships that involve BDSM, cuckolding/cuckqueaning, friends with benefits, or that are just "open" relationships are this way.

    Flirting is usually harmless especially if the guy seems to flirt with everyone including his own woman still. But if he stops flirting with his own woman and specifically flirts with one woman, sometimes that isn't so great with a lot of women. It's a sign that he's showing a preference for another women, and not many women feel so great that their own man responds to other women before her.

    Sharing their partner sexually is a bit extreme for a lot of couples. Most do not want their partner to openly stray because monogamy is a bit more than just showing sexual favouritism to one partner, but STDs play a factor today more than ever. Most women would not agree to this arrangement even if a man is up front about it rather than cheat behind her back.

    The jealousy emotion can be brought on from a lot of things, not just from sex and flirting. Some partners become jealous if they think their man is preferring ANYone over them, including family members or guy friends.

    I think if each partner knows their limits then expectations on what's okay and not okay can be determined early in the relationship. There has to be a lot of honesty going on here for them to conclude whether or not something like an extra sex partner is going to be had from the other partner who claims they will be fine with it. If someone is not honest about any of this, then introducing an alternate sex life to the other partner will be very hurtful for both to learn later on that it wasn't okay.

    I, myself am not jealous by nature but do draw the line if my husband has sex with someone else, and engages in heated flirting with another woman. If he just compliments a woman or says something sexual on the fly (it's usually in front of me anyway), I don't care because I know his personality and knows that a lot of times what he says is an accident anyway. LOL

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What Guys Said 16

  • I'm not a huge fan of the whole "harmless flirting" thing. I see it written a lot that doing such-and-such type of flirting while in a relationship is okay (or even beneficial for the relationship, in some cases), and I think it's a load of B. S.

    And of course, sleeping with someone else is never gonna fly with me. If it ever happens, I'd consider the relationship terminated immediately. No way I'd ever allow that kind of thing.

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  • That has got nothing to do with being open minded. People are not meant to cheat on each other and that is why any girl that cheated on me would be dumped.

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    • well... this is not about cheating... its about being comfortable and confident enough to let your partner widen his/her sex life with someone other than you... to gain experiences.

    • well... sleeping with someone else is cheating as far as I am concerned... I would not to that to a girl so I expect the same respect back...

  • I wouldn't consider that "open minded" at all.
    That's just trying to have your cake and eat it too.

    If you love a person and want nobody but them.. that makes far more sense to me.
    Else why else would you enter a relationship and not just stay dating?

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    • you are going to stay in the relationship... just be open to all sort of things that you and your partner might enjoy together

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    • Open relationship is being in a relationship yet not sexually committed to that person.. I did say open relationship right?
      If my partner allowed that, we wouldn't be together ad I don't agree with that at all.
      If you love someone... you love just them.
      Not fuck other people because you want to.. lol

    • I get it...

  • Flirting to having sex is a pretty big jump.

    I would have to discuss the whole open relationship thing with them first to establish some rules and boundaries.

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    • its not an open relationship... its a relationship just being mature enough to allow them to sleep with other people without conflict

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    • That's still an open relationship. Everything you are describing in your comments and responses here is an open relationship.

    • Never mind you are not understanding where I'm coming from

  • i´m not ok with sexual activities with other people, while in a relationship. flirting is fine, as long as it doesn´t get physical or pictures including nudes (sexting).
    i´m not possessive, she can have sex with whoever she want´s but then our relationship comes to an end.

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  • No, I want my girlfriend for myself and no one else. I expect her to have the same principles.

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    • Same as I feel :) I can't imagine sharing my boyfriend with anyone else!!

  • Completely closed.

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  • I would never let my girlfriend sleep with someone else. If she asked me to let her have sex with another guy I'd dump her so she can sleep with whoever she wants to

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  • I have no limits on how much she can flirt, but sex will need pre-negotiated agreements on limits and veto rights.

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    • what if she allowed you to do it with someone else, would you?

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    • Please re-read what I wrote and consider how much of your last comment applies to my position.

    • @meatballs21 don't laugh at my small grammatical error..."Hypocritical and immature"

  • I'm generally open minded, but in this case my mind is closed!

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    • what if she lets you do it with someone else... only let her know who and how you met and that she knows and understand that you are in a relationship... and won't leave it for her.

    • I'm not into open relationships, nor am I for polyandry and polygamy. I wouldn't frown upon others who are for it, but it's not for me.

  • I'm completely open about it if it doesn't affect me in any way. I'd take it as her own business, not mine. Suppose she wants to have sex with another guy -- I'm fine with it as long as she doesn't get pregnant or something like that.

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  • being in love , can't do it , not in love , if I let her is so I can do the same

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    • what if your girl allowed you to do it?

    • I'm in love with her and she's allow it , I can't my heart is with her, when I love its faithfulness , not just in action but in my thoughts , actually , I don't seem to notice other girls , they are there , but like sisters.
      If she asked me if she could and I was in love , I would think she doesn't love me , girls needed and want that emotional bond, having sex with someone else means more than just sex.

    • i get it...

  • Completely open minded as long as I can do the same

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  • Nope. Not flirt or sleep with, that's a me-only thing!

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    • so you are not open minded enough to allow that... to me its all about the honesty of it... if you are doing it make sure we talk it through before hand... no surprises. i would need to know who that person is and why you want to sleep with them... just be honest about it and ill understand.

    • SLEEP with other people? No!

  • I hv no problem. . as long as sh3 keep sending nudes. .

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  • I'd be OK with it as long as there was no danger of STD's. I wouldn't want to hear about it.

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What Girls Said 12

  • Flirting and sleeping with someone are very different things. Lol I wouldn't be happy if my partner flirted with someone else but I would just talk to him about it, it wouldn't be a deal-breaker. Sleeping with someone else is cheating and I will never tolerate that.

    That doesn't mean I'm possessive or "crazy jealous" either. It just means I prefer monogamy and will not settle for anything other than a faithful partner. If someone wants to sleep with other people, they should be in an open relationship and I'm not the type of person who would want to be in a relationship like that.

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  • Not that open minded, I do not like it if my boyfriend sleeps around. I consider it cheating. There are different levels of flirting, and if it's harmless then it is ok I guess. I don't particularly like it though, since I am loyal and expect the same in my partner.

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  • I.. what?
    I mean, no.. I wouldn't think cheating was okay.
    It won't happen and I'd be okay with it.

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  • It really depends.

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  • NO NEVER!!! Maybe some flirting but NEVER sleeping with someone else!! That's totally cheating and wrong...

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  • No way in hell I'd let my boyfriend do that.

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  • Lol if that is the sole deffinition of open mindedness, then i am not open minded at all

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  • Zero. I will not tolerate with that shit. He don't gotta tolerate my shit neither XD.

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  • I ain't open minded at all

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  • I think that most women would appreciate a man who loves them so much that they only have eyes for her. Your self ssteem is probably so low that you don't think You'll ever find such a man, so you pretend to be progressive and open minded in attempt to take control of an otherwise pathetic situation. I feel bad for you.

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  • Not open minded at all. Flirting maybe a little, as we all do it

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  • it has NOTHING to do with openmindness...

    thats not open minded...

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