Pursuing a girl whose ex boyfriend is still around?

Alright so I met this girl about 4 months ago whom I work with, it wasn't until recently about 1 month ago that we have gotten to know each other more and I've developed a liking towards her. Signs that I noticed she showed interested were that she casually mentioned in conversation that she was single a few times, body language, she asked for my number incase she ever needed it, so we exchanged numbers, she would come and start coversations with me. She tells me that Im a really calm guy and when I graduate and leave this job how she hopes she doesn't get stuck with people she doesn't like.

I finally decided to ask her out casually for lunch recently and she agreed. We set a date and location which is coming up. However yesterday she texted me and told me that she was in a awkward situation with her ex boyfriend who she spilt with 2 years ago, she told me they were on and off all the time and he wasn't too happy she was going out to lunch with me. But she was still interested in lunch and told me he would get over it.

If I had known this from the start I would have second guessed asking her out as I dont want to get involved in drama, but at the same time she is a really cool girl, I like her and I dont want to tell her I'm not going anymore. A co worker told me a while back that she had issues with her ex who would leave her for others girls but then come back to her and leave her again over and over, the dude is basically a player. So I assume this messes her up emotionally big time.

She doesn't seem to go out much because she has 3 jobs so I guess meeting new people for her is not easy, so perhaps that whys she isn't fully over her ex as he still gives her attenton?

Why would she mention to her ex that she was going out to lunch with another guy in the first place?


What Girls Said 1

  • She keeps in contact with her ex. and tells him personal information because he still has her heart.
    Even if she went out with you... a piece of her is still with him.

    You're already wrapped up in this situation a little more than you need to be.
    I advise you to pull yourself out... before more feelings get involved.
    She's still in love with her ex.
    No matter how cool she is... that doesn't change the fact.
    She cannot give her self to you (emotionally) if she's with someone else in that way.
    It just won't happen.
    Even if she tries... she'll constantly be conflicted because of the dilemma she's in.

    I think you should try not to pursue anything.


What Guys Said 1

  • Get out now!!! You still have time to stay out of a bad situation.