What's the one biggest thing that hurts your interactions/relationships with the opposite sex?

Mine is by getting in my own head and not being able to get out of it. If I were a drunk, everything would be amazing with it but obviously that's not a reasonable solution lol...

*Also, if you're gay then obviously answer teh question for the same sex.

  • Getting in you head/doubting yourself
    40% (20)50% (23)45% (43)Vote
  • looks
    12% (6)9% (4)10% (10)Vote
  • unlikable personality
    18% (9)28% (13)23% (22)Vote
  • busy
    6% (3)4% (2)5% (5)Vote
  • other (explain in opinions)
    24% (12)9% (4)17% (16)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Mine would probably be my self confidence. I have next to none and always think he doesn't like me, is going to find someone better, along with that I struggle with depression and my anxiety also doesn't help when I over think things, combine that with my lacking confidence and I'm of thinking he's about to start a new relationship and have a family with say, a girl he works with or something. However I don't let him know I think this, but some times something will slip.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I'm incredibly shy.

    Because of my shyness, I am very unlikely to approach a woman. But at the same time, women pretty much expect men to always approach.

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What Girls Said 18

  • I can be a little too sensitive in relationships.

    Outside of relationships, as far as dating goes, my biggest hang ups were arrogant guys trying to tell me what to do, doesn't sit well with me so maybe I was too strong willed at times.

    Also being too comfortable doing my own thing and having my own life as well, some guys expect you to give up everything for them and to morph into one person just because you're dating them, I can't/won't do that.

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  • I'm too easy, too perverted and too confident. I think guys are intimidated by me.

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    • lol so crazy that we worry about a perverted girl having diseases but not a perverted guy...

    • Being perverted doesn't mean I'm a slut lol. I just have a really perverted vocabulary. :D

    • And also by easy I don't mean giving it to everyone! I'm really picky but when I pick one in a million I say he won't need to move a finger to get me, I'm already his. :D

  • Mine is my shyness and not being able to open up right away

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    • you think guys might misread that as disinterest?

    • Yeah probably and I think guys don't have the patience to wait around for someone to get comfortable around them. I'm lucky my boyfriend choose to stick around :)

  • they don't seem to be able to keep uo with me

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    • lol in what way?

    • I'm very direct and I know what I want and so it makes them usually a bit scared
      I'm very ambitious and I want a lot but I also give a lot and most are not able or not willing to give the same

  • Lack of communication. I like to communicate with my partner, not know where he is 24/7 or anything. But if we had plans, it'd be nice if he sent a text letting me know he'd be late or something. I also think it's cute when he calls (hands free) on his way home from work, or calls me at night before bed.

    The guys I dated where very much into calling or texting in the beginning, a bit too much actually. Once they stop communicating, I get a bit irritated. I tried to let it go, but it's disrespectful to me. Once I start losing respect for them, I don't want to be around them any more and I detach.

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    • yeah, that's how it is for a lot of guys. we get excited when we meet someone new but once we feel like we've been there and done that it can feel like a chore.

    • It felt like that for me as well. That's why I don't take too much stock in the infatuation stage. It's afterwards that matters more.

  • Probably my inability to let them know how important they are to me... no, that's a lie. My inability to genuinely value one human over another. My inability to pretend my life would be over if they left me and my refusal to pretend I'd never be happy again.

    My realism and honesty.

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  • I get nervous around men but, not because of insecurities. It's complicated.

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    • tell me more

    • I'm genuinely scared. It's like my anxiety spirals around them because I don't know what they're gonna do and I fear the worst. I know it's fucked up...

  • My own anxiety and because I'm really career driven and sometimes my partner finds that a turn off

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    • career related anxiety or generalized?

    • Generalised! I'm a realist and a massive over thinker

    • me too! Sucks :( There's an app that's been helping me a lot called Headspace. You should get it!

  • Lack of communication is the greatest problem. Gotta be able to talk to your mate and hear/listen to your mate.

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    • is it usually you have that has the communication problem or them? Surely some couples are able to communicate well..

    • Communication is a two way street. And I agree, some couples are able to communicate well and those are the ones that have the best chance of survival.

  • What do you mean by being in your head bc I thought it meant thinking instead of interacting with others.

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    • i. e. wondering if what you have to say is cool, funny, interesting. trying to figure out if the interaction is going well

  • It's shyness :/

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  • Im a pleaser :/

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  • Looks would be first, then doubting myself would be second. Although I would say that doubting myself is not completely irrational...

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  • I'm a bit quirky and out there (a lot of my friends call me a hipster for some reason). And while this means I have amazing girlfriends, it also seems to means guys are often scared off. The ones I do attract are often know-it-all assholes who have to show how smart they are all the time and can't have a decent conversation or are rather one dimensional. In addition to that, I'm not particularly pretty, am really athletic (rugby is life lol), very driven (academically), passionate (about a lot of social issues, interests and hobbies), and rather independent (I like my "me time"). Most guys just aren't interested in that, it would seem, and often don't (never) approach me and only approach my friends (who I can admit are prettier lol).

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    • dating older works for a lot of girls who match your description from what I've observed.

  • I end up liking guys who turn out to be wishy washy and flaky with their personalities.

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  • Myself esteem cuz i am ugly and fat

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  • doubting myself...

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  • I have a hard time trusting a guys intentions. Only been with guys that wanted only sex or to be friends with benefits.

    Taking a break from the dating scene because I want a serious commited relationship, not playing around. But with the trust problem it's hard

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What Guys Said 19

  • My dry, deadpan sarcasm. Some people get it, most do not. I think it's funny either way.

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  • I always end up getting the pretty girl in the social group attracted to me but I'm always thinking "I can't ask her out or anything she's too dam beautiful"

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  • The only thing that stops my ability to get with women is their availability. If they weren't so busy all the time, I would be WITH them.

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  • Not understanding my window of making a move/ what move I even want? Do I just want sex? Do I even want to get involved with this girl as hot as she is?
    I never know if , I want a girlfriend or if I just want female company.. So I feel like I pursue half ass.. I never go all out , I'm hot and cold... I might text you here , shoot you a date request there.. If the answer isn't up to my exception I usually ghost for a bit (not intentionally) but I just forget about texting the girl.. then out of the blue , I might shoot some texts to 6-7 different girls (some are happy to hear from me) I usually spit some funny cocky game get them excited.. I may get one date.. or none.. or get a girl to accept only to flake on me rinse repeat..
    I guess to some it up, I really just half ass interactions and my intentions are never really clear.. I am not direct because generally I am unsure of what I want from girls.

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  • I don't really like talking to strangers.

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  • A by far. I over think everything and suffer from low self-esteem in the context of dating especially.

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  • C, but IDGAF enough to change.

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  • My looks and features. Unless science improves to where I can have an option to wake up as a new person, I'm pretty much stuck being single.

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  • As the guy with the worst spread on the "Would you date me" topic I'd have to imagine it's all personality.

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    • interesting. what about your personality is unlikable?

    • Probably has to do with being far too analytical and having to be right. It doesn't matter if you're wrong or right, I jut want to know the right answer regardless. People get offended by that apparently, or if you're trying to correct them on something they're absolutely wrong about, people don't like to know they're wrong. I guess people feel like someone thinks they're stupid they get corrected; that's kind of a sign of low intellectual capacity to me and that's not attractive. So that along with my straight forward conversation and direct questions make me seem like I have problems when really I just don't like wasting time or being wrong.

    • hm yeah i can see that being an issue for you and for others. so you just need really smart people or it's hard for you to relate?

  • Doubt would have to be the biggest problem. i always think that i am not going to be worth their time

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  • that i don't have a lot of money.

    if it was me vs a CEO or a corporation. She'd dump me as if the stock market crashed.

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  • I have a chip on my shoulder because of the myriad ways women have abused me in the past.

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    • such as?

    • The game, the friend zone (the abusive version, where you are led on and tapped for services) for starters. Gotta go to sleep. Message me if you want a more thoughtful reply.

  • You forgot thee one with men that I suffer from: I'm too nice and easy going.

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  • me its some times being random and spontanious, pretty much a double edged sword some like it others dont.

    Its just one of those things

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  • My general pursuit for perfection.

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  • Cheaters cheater cheatering. Bastards. Once a cheater always a cheater, and that will fuck with everything!

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  • how about talking about hte smallest thing... ? buhahahaha

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  • I want things equal with them and that doesn't go very well with the ladies.

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  • they almost always have friend groups and aren't looking for new friends or relationships (my high school experience).

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