Competing with BF's friends, when is it time for him to grow up?

Me and this guy have been dating for almost a year and we love each other a lot, when things are good, they are amazing, when they are bad, it's hell on the verge of breakup. We're both in our 30's, I was married 10 years, he has been partying living the single life for most of his life with a relationship here and there but nothing serious. I consider myself an all around woman, I'm the buddy, cook, am clean, independent, work, have my own and keep in shape. I don't like ratchet females or the outlets where they are found. I do like to go out and have fun every so often, but I prefer lounges, comedy clubs, events etc. He on the other hand is very familiar with the strip club scene and knows a lot of these "type" of females. He says he's ready to start working towards settling down, he still "ditches" me for his homeboys, who are a bunch of losers who don't work and live in strip clubs and run the streets to no end. None of them have anything accomplished, don't own jack or hold a serious relationship and are in their 30s trying to be local superstars and he follows them to their events, which causes us to fall out every single time, especially because he waits until the last minute to tell me. His buddies tried to get with me and got rejected prior to us meeting. I don't have a problem with him going out, but go to a sports bar, a decent club & not until everything in the city shuts down. I'm trying to work towards a future (buy a house, open a buisness, start a family etc) and he gets defensive every time accusing me of trying to cage him but what bothers me is the people he's around and the kind of females they surround themselves with. I want him to grow out of this stage and focus on our future. Keep in mind he is a good, smart guy but when it comes to his "crew", I feel like I'm always on the losing end as he jumps when they call him. After it's all said and done he tells me it wasn't even that great, it was lame etc.. I love this man but start to think I'm not his priority. Please advise...


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What Guys Said 1

  • If you don't want to marry him after a year, it's time to move on.

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