What did I do wrong?

I was dating a girl a couple of months and since I went with some friends to drink a beer she changed.

She started acussing me that I was a drunkard out of nowhere. I told her that a few of my colleagues got drunk and starting talking about existential questions and funny stuff which was really amusing.

After that she would constantly nit pick anything that I did. From time to time she would call me childlish. Eventually I started fighting back and defending myself. Things went smoothly after that for a while.

But eventually she started getting bored or appearing more and more disinterested. But it was the same things that worked in the begining, the same kind of jokes and things with some variation. I was getting the feeling that I was spoiling her too much.

So I asked her 3 times to go out but she made crappy excuses so I quit asking her out and told her that she would have to ask me otherwise I won't ask her out. Which seemed fair to me.

A week went past and she started talking to me and hinting that she wanted to go out with me. I knew that she wanted to go out with me but after all the stuff that she did I considered that it is her responsibilty and the mature thing to do. So I ignored her signals and pretended not to notice them.

By that time I was the only one initiating everything, while in the begining it was around 50/50. This wasn't going in a direction I wanted it. I didn't go through all the trouble with her just for her to put me do everything for her and to her start changing the rules as she wanted.

So I just stopped contacting her. It took her two weeks to contact me back. That's a lot of time and when she contacted me I said to her that it took her long enough and that she had forgotten completely. She turned it back and said that I was the one that forgot about her. But I was the one that would always initiate, if I didn't initiate she would do nothing.

She told me that if I ever wanted to see her that I would need to invite her. What's the deal here?


Most Helpful Guy

  • She's crazy and controlling-You're way too nice and too easy to control and give explanations too easily. When you're dating a girl; I personally don't believe they should be trying to adjust your lifestyle choices. It's simply non of their business; they are just a girlfriend. She seems like she just likes the attention.


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What Guys Said 5

  • What went wrong? Your girlfriend is crazy and controlling and it finally came out. What's the deal? You are lucky to be away from her before she got pregnant or worse. You need better boundaries. You should have dropped her the minute she started accusing you of being a drunkard. I don't know what her problem is, maybe she had a drunk father and she's terrified of anyone drinking, but she's needs help.

  • Get out of the relationship if you don't like her the same way you did in the beginning.

  • Sounds like she's vexed. Some people have a problem w/ those who drink alcohol.

  • This girl is crazy, and she's a ball-buster to boot. She did you a favor by removing herself from your life; consider yourself lucky.


  • The better question is, why are you still trying to have her be a part of your life.

    She sounds crazy. Just like her mother.

    Tell her that and this problem's solved.

    • She has a weird relationship with her mother and really close too.