How do I get over not being able to date the perfect girl for me?

Basically there is this incredible girl that I met and I liked her so much. We hung out all the time, she was so gorgeous, she was one of the only girls I have dated who I haven't found faults in. I liked her so much, and then I blinked and I was back home, 3,200 miles from her. I met her studying in Italy, and she was so cute, so nice, so caring and compassionate. I have never in my life met someone as great as her, I have dated around in America, but a lot of girls I have dated here were selfish or just not very nice people. This girl literally cancelled plans she had to visit her grandparents, to take me and a couple friends on a tour of Milan (where she lived for a while). She was always thinking of me, bringing me cute lunches from local bakers, and she was so much fun to go out with, she took me on trips to different parts of Italy, she showed me these awesome local restaraunts, she took me out for picnics in the local fields and would always make the food fresh, and she did most of it without me even asking. She would just suggest "Hey how would you feel about going to Naples this weekend? I can take you and translate", it was awesome. I liked her so much, and then I came back to reality. I ended the relationship because I knew I wasn't going back to Italy for a while, and the long distance thing would be hard. But I am finding it even harder being away from her. I see her posts on social media from time to time and it just makes me sad seeing her beautiful face in Italy. I really miss her. Its been 4 months since I left, and I still can't stop thinking about her. Other girls I have met just haven't been as appealing as her, they werent as caring, or sweet, or beautiful, or any of that. I wish I could go back to Italy, and be with her for more time because I really miss her.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • so you would never see her rarely than ever?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Sounds like a story that 90% of exchange students have. It just means that you haven't come around much before. First time abroad for some time, it's new, exotic. It kinda deludes your senses. Your mind tells you it's so much better than what you have at home but the truth is, you just don't see all the negative things that lie on the bottom of it. It's a superficial experience that focuses on the positive side of things. I'm sure you really like her, and it's not easy to get over such feelings. Just give it time, there is not much you can do really.

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What Girls Said 1

  • Make a plan and get back with her! You sound like you've got something special, you can't let it go!

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What Guys Said 1

  • If you felt so strongly about the woman, I would find a way. Where there is a will, there's a way. Even if it seems unlikely, if you want it bad enough, you can find a way.

    But, before you travel 3k miles to see her again, I'll let you know that there ARE women like that all over - you just have to find them. Really good women are a rare commodity anymore, but they are there.

    As for getting over her - you'll just have to move on and let time do its thing. You'll notice yourself thinking of her less and less. Find a hobby that will get your mind off of her. Work extra hours if you can. Do things to occupy your time. Eventually, the memories will be there, but they will disconnect from the emotion.

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