So 2 days ago i told my girlfriend i can hangout with her only 1 day a week and then she got all sad and said she'll miss me. I told her you can always call me. Anyways, well i been answering texts late and calls and she says i don't pay attention to her. Is one time a week enough or does she have the right in saying "we should see each other 3 times a week".
I think one is ok. What do you think?
- Make more room for herVote A
- If you're busy she should understandVote B
Most Helpful Girl
Well to be honest 1 day a week isn't much time. I would be sad if my boyfriend rarely spent any time with me.
I can definitely understand some weeks when a guy is busy or has things going on that he just can't see me. I get that, I understand. However, if every week it was "Well, I'm too busy everyday, sorry" well ya, I would most likely be sad too.
Sounds to me like she really does care about you and wants to spend time with you. No harm in that. What I would do is try to make whatever time you can for her. Maybe some weeks you can see her 3 times and other weeks only 1? Maybe that will make her happy.
Just keep an open dialogue with her and let her know what's going on in your life. Do sweet things for her when you can't see her. Maybe once in a while send her flowers or a card. That way she at least knows you are thinking about her.
I know for me that would make me feel better if my boyfriend did that when he couldn't see me.0
Most Helpful Guy
This is a tough one because every girl is different. If you are both ambitious, independent and hard working people, you'll probably spend little time together because you're immersed in your career. This is a good thing, if your emotional and relationship needs are both met.
However, if there is a mismatch, it can be disastrous for a relationship. For example, if you're a medical doctor who works 18-24 hour shifts at a hospital, and she is a housewife or if she works a 9am-5pm job, she will definitely feel neglected since she's at home all evening and you're not around.
However, you have every right to work hard in your career. I am in a similar situation now, where my wife and I both work similar hours (9am-5pm jobs). However, I told her that I am aiming for a very high position job, and I would probably work every day from 7am-midnight. The perk is that I'd make over $200,000/year and we'd never worry about money. The problem is, she has to understand and accept the consequences of me not being around during the week, and only around for the weekends.
I managed to convince her that the pros (financial stability, early retirement, never having to worry about money) were better than the cons (less time spent together). She understood, but that's because we're married. I suspect you are not, so she probably doesn't care about financial stability unless she's sharing in your salary. It's best for you to talk to her and lay out the long term benefits.1