I've been speaking to this guy for around a month now and long story short we really like eachother! He's hoping we can turn into something, he's very serious about it and has even told his family etc about me lol. He's really sweet all the time, like he'll say he literally has eyes for only me and is thinking about me 24/7 bless him. I have been really open with how much I like him too but is it wise to hold back to maintain his interest? He's so special to me, I really don't want to mess this one up.
- Yes hold backVote A
- No just don't over think things and carry on as normalVote B
- I don't knowVote C
Most Helpful Guy
Just to say, *don't* take dating advice from me, but, I should have thought that the function of the 'don't be so open about your feelings' notion, is as an *initial* filter, so people can naturally be wary of people that become attached, 'craving', even though you've barely spoken a word. This is usually an indication that they've actually fallen in love with an image they thus created (we could argue most love is this, but let's not get into that now) mentally, which is slightly unhealthy. To state more explicitly, that this makes sense only when you've just started talking and in the very early stages - which you seem to have passed.
Personally, I don't think you should play games, and that you should keep things natural, and that you should be wary about circumscribed and intellectually extricated *shoulds* with regard to relationships, that have lost their context. He's expressed his strong desire for you. Why do you torture his pour soul with lukewarm-ness :( Poor fellow. All he wishes for is his raging desire to be reciprocated (and ultimately consummated, in the wild throes of that youthish passion, that we adults so yearn for)!1
Most Helpful Girl
I will tell you one thing: if you really like someone, tell them. It is not by playing games that you will raise someone's interest, but by letting them know just how much you mean to them. If he is the right guy and is genuinely interested in you, he will appreciate it more if you are open with him.
Besides, if it turns into something more serious, what kind of pace do you want to set for this relationship?
If you start with honesty and straightforwardness, it will make it easier between you both. You will acquire the habit of being like that with each other for the rest of the relationship.
And really, it takes so much grief out of it.
So many feelings can be hurt or misunderstandings can arise from not being open with each other.
Maybe I am exagerating here, but I know that I have benneficiated from always trying to be open with my boyfriend and communicate about something that was bothering me.
It deepens and strenghtens the relationship, creates intimacy and is a fuel for love and romance as well.
It is a bond you will be able to relish and enjoy from
Feels great to have that level of trust and intimacy with someone.1