Transitioning from being friends to being lovers?

After being friends for a while, we confessed that we like each other and today we oficially started a relationship. Now: I like everything about my girlfriend, but im not used to being her lover! When im with her, i dont know what to do. Should i tease her as i used to when we were friends? Or should i hold her hands and say sweet things to her? ALSO, this is my first relationship ever.. So my brain is in a shock! I have never kissed or held hands with a girl before.. And here i am in a relationship with my close friend, all of a sudden. My question is: is it normal to feel that way? What can I do to help myself get used to the new transition? I really want to do anything just to for our relationship to workout.. Any ideas?

Updates:
Anyone?
Today when I saw her i realized that I get nervous and shy! I think thats the main reason behind awkwardness. By time i will get comfortable with her, is that right?

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Whatever you do, don't stop being the guy she fell for. Keep being teasing and playful AND hold her hand and tell her honestly how you feel about her. Try to get out of your head, stop worrying, and trust that this girl already KNOWS you and really likes you, and may be just as anxious as you are for everything to work out well.
    Most of my dating experience has been falling for guys who were my friends first - it's the best foundation for being lovers. We just relaxed into it and enjoyed feeling ridiculously lucky that it worked out that way.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Isn't most of a relationship just normal everyday life? If the previous conduct was enough to incite her affections, why terminate it?

    Just treat her as you normally do. That should be the main thing. The sweet thing should be an add-on.

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What Girls Said 10

  • Sounds perfectly normal. I was in a similar position at one point, as before we started dating, my boyfriend and I were just really close friends. It was tough to make that jump from friends to more, sort of awkward at a few points. Don't stress about having to act like a couple at any point though. As you guys get used to this new title of being a couple, it'll all come on naturally in it's own time.

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    • Exactly. We are just taking things slowly and waiting for it to come naturally. However, since this is my forst relationship, i feel confused, nervous and a but overwhelmed!

    • First relationship*, a bit*

  • I know how you feel, I started dating my best friend about 8 months ago, we still do the same goofy stuff we always did together, we do sweet romanticy stuff too (sometimes lol it's not really either of our thing). The way for this to go long term is still be her friend but also be romantic, don't act differently from how you normally would. Also in terms of getting sexual go slow, figure out what you're comfortable with, and what she's comfortable with. There's no need to rush, since a big part of intimacy is building trust between you two, which takes time. And don't worry about messing up, just laugh it off. (I've had my moments lol) and try again next time. There's no point if you can't laugh at yourself and goof around a bit. All in all continue to Be yourself, have patience and communicate with her.

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  • You're normal. I think the best couples are best friends. Putting sex and such aside, when you're in a romantic relationship, you have to become less selfish and more cognizant of the other person. In addition to actions, verbal affirmations work too. You've always shared a laugh when she does something funny, but now you can add “you're cute.” If you fell in love with the way she smiles, tell her you love the way she smiles or that she's beautiful or something.
    Don't be afraid to kiss her though, or else we'll next see a question “Why won't my boyfriend kiss me?” 😑

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    • Haha that was so sweet! You are 100% right. Thank you.

  • Awwwww!!! Yes it's perfectly normal to feel that way when your not familiar with something but don't stress it or overthink the good thing is that since you two were friends before she'll most likely be understanding about it. And you can't really do anything with time you'll get comfortable and with experience. Lol don't stress it this isn't a test everything will come to you naturally :) good luck !! 😌

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  • Don't stop being her friend, that's one of the greatest things about a relationship is when you are also friends. Add in small things and make the changes slow, it might be a little strange for her at first. Do what you would normally do, only maybe invite her to a movie and hold her hand more. A small kiss before you leave each time to let her know you are interested in her too as more than a friend.

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  • being yourself? lol she likes you for who you are. Tease her, joke with her. all girls love attention from their boyfriend. don't worry and let it come naturally. if you have a urge to kiss her, then go for it. If she's looking pretty, tell her. when your walking down the street and you wanna hold her hand... do it lol Trust me, making a girl happy isn't all that hard to do.

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    • okay! thank you! I know im trying to be myself but my brain is just so distracted.

  • Just continue being yourself. She already likes you. However, I do think you need to take initiative and begin the transition from being friends to also being lovers. That does include being romantic :)

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  • It is a little awkward at first. When you see her, give her a kiss so that you both remember its a romantic relationship. Then do whatever the hell you kids do.

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  • I think that you are just used to be friends with her but dont worry! If you stay together and you do what lovers do, you will get used to it, it just needs some time 😊

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  • just take things slow.

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What Guys Said 5

  • Hey man what you feeling is perfectly normal, I asked my best friend out 7 months ago and at first things were kinda awkward 'cause we weren't used to being intimate with each other plus she was my first girlfriend so I know where you coming from. Just give it time and stay the same as you were before, just be more sweet and caring towards her and like hold her hand when you'll walking or sitting together (girls love that). After your first kiss with her, things would definitely fall into place. Plus things would definitely work out since you'll are close friends as you both already know what each other likes and dislikes so there's nothing to worry about. I hope things work out for you man 'cause dating your best friend is like the best feeling ever.

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  • Keep just being you. She liked you as you were. If she didn't she wouldn't have taken the chance of going out with a friend.

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  • OMG. Fuck you the one guy that got out of the friendzone.

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  • hold her hand, stare into her eyes... sit too close, fall asleep in each others arms. it'll happen bud =)

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  • You know you love her she obviously knows she loves you. If anything changed wouldn't you know by your talks? Love her as only you know how to man

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