Girl acting very distant (like a 180 in a day), after finding out grandfather has months to live. What Should I do, need opinions?

Well this girl messaged me and added me on facebook a few months ago, after years of not talking. Will we talk about everyday with maybe 10 to 15 messages. We have gone on a few dates.
Well last weekend she found out her grandfather signed do not resuscitate and he refusing and more medical help, so he probabily won't make it though winter. Well after that she started talking to me less and not answering all my texts making short converstions. When she doesn't reply I text her a few days asking how things are going, which she replys right off, but only last 5 or 6 texts before she doesn't respond. After doing that twice, I feel that she doesn't want to talk.
The week before this she was talking to me and flirting. She did cancel the date that she asked me on that week because she got called into work. She didn't give a another day for a date, but in the past she waits a few days to replan due to not knowing her work schedule and she got the news two days after that. She told me the week before after canceling the date and the week this was happening she was still interested in me. She also works 2 to 3 14 hour shifts at work every week usaully, so she could be busy with work on top of everything, but she always talked before during work.
I am thinking I will just give her space, hoping she will contact me later on. The way she seems like she doesn't want to talk, plus I don't want to come of as needy. Am I doing the right thing? Do you think she is acting distant because she just isn't interested or is it because of everything going on?


Most Helpful Girl

  • It sounds like it's all too much for her right now (everything with her pops) I would give her some time to be. Sounds like she just wants to have sometime to herself right now. I would wait a bit, for her, to come to meme, if I was you.

    • Most likely that is what I am going to do. Might check to see how she is doing in a week or so if she doesn't contact me just to show I am still there. If that is a good idea. The thing that is got me worried though is that I see her on facebook a lot and today she post pictures of her with her best friend out and about. So I have thoughts she is just blowing me off cause she found someone else. (which has happen to me a lot, which has me thinking the days of being a gentleman are over.). Still when she started talking less to me and me having to text her after a few days of no contact, all started when she found out about her grandfather. I just wish She would just let me know what the case is, it not like I am a random guy, we have talked for months.

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    • Well, that is good you think I am not just random guy to her. We have talked for almost 3 months and shared a lot about are self's and went on a few dates, so I really should think that too. She had said that she likes talking to me and compliments my personally and work ethic a few weeks before this she found out this bad news. Plus she was the one to seek me out in the beginning. Then her telling me she was still interested (which she could have said that not to hurt my feelings) Just has caught me off guard, the way she pulled away like she did and it seems like she is blowing me completely off. Makes me feel like she doesn't care anything about me.

    • Thanks by the way. It helps a lot talking about it to someone.

Most Helpful Guy

  • her grandfather is dying. like you thought give her space, understand that at this moment I imagine a relationship isn't the 1st, 2nd, 3rd or even 6th thought in her head. try to support her. let her know that you're around to talk or whatever whenever she needs it.

    • Should I text her in a week or so to see how things are going and let her know I am still here?

    • totally. you can do it sooner if you want.

What Girls Said 1

  • She's grieving and needs time. Giving her space is the right thing to be doing here.


What Guys Said 0

The only opinion from guys was selected the Most Helpful Opinion!