I have been talking to this guy online every day for a year. We know eachother in real life/hung out once... He seemed quite interested in me but recently backed off. Nothing happened between us but I guess his interest is fading or he's just busy. Either way I'm used to having guys chase me, and having options of people to date, and this guy is sort of opposite. He isn't very good with women, is average looking at best and kind of reclusive. Obviously there are good things about him which is why I began to really like him, but now I feel bitter that someone who people would say is below my league is not reciprocating interest anymore. I know it's wrong to feel that way, and I am disappointed because I really did like him... But since we never dated I don't want to make this an issue with him/bring it up. I just have to accept the distance he creates and move on. How do I get over these negative feelings though? Have you ever felt the same? Thoughts/advice?
To clarify, though I said "nothing happened between us," he did buy me dinner, put his arm around me, and kissed me goodnight on the time we hung out. However we hadn't seen each other since then... Just talking online. Also, yes he knows I am interested... I asked him what he saw happening between us (friends, friends with benefits, dating) so I would assume he would think I am interested if I asked that.
Maybe you're the one below his league... I don't believe in leagues anyways, but you're just sounding like an entitled person who thinks that she needs to get all the attention and put no effort because you're "better" than him. You still gotta put effort, if he feels like he's doing everything, even if he's "less" attractive than you, he's still gonna get bored.
I've talked to girls that I consider more attractive than me, and have stopped talking to them after I see they just act like I gotta do all the job cause she's in a "higher league" than me. Fuck that, I don't play kid's games.
Too many women often think they are in the premier league when they are actually in the second or third division when it comes to dating and listen to folks telling them this. It seems likely that he found a girl who he likes and she has grabbed hold of him. there's a good chance she is in a higher league when compared to you.
Most probably he felt that since you're "out of his league" it would be best not to get involved with you much further. He may have thought that: "Oh she might have dozens of other guys who are better than me to talk to, so why should I try?" Or he could just be busy. :P In any case, why have negative feelings over things that never happened? If you wanted some spark to be there between you both, maybe you could've taken the initiative (that would be better for people under the impression of "below your league"). If not, then don't ponder too much about the situation.
This is a classic case. Attractive women get hit on etc. all the time and when they meet an average guy who doesn't show the interest she is used to receiving, she is suddenly insecure and also curious; like what is so special about this guy..
He's probably shy. You mentioned he isn't good with woman that's because he most likely lacks experience. I'm also a woman that's used to guys chasing me. When I had someone like that in my life , for the timebeing I had to take on t he dominant role just to get things started. These guys are usually the type to like someone but are so afraid they let opportunities pass them by. You sort of have to take the upper hand. Eventually he will even things out by doing so himself. he just needs to warm up to you more and get more comfortable.
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