My girlfriends aunt passed away Labor Day weekend. She's still upset about it and can't get over it. I've been with her 9 years she was like this when her other uncle passed a few years ago. He was her favorite. It took her a long time to get over that. It kind of scares her because her auntl lived right across the street she just died in her sleep they don't even know what happened yet. She's worried that the same thing will happen to me or her mom or her dad or worse herself. She's been crying to sleep about every night. Even when we make love or kiss she cries. She did the same thing when it happened to her uncle too. She couldn't get over him for a couple years. I'm afraid she's gonna do the same thing this time I'm really worried about her. How can I comfort her when she cries? What should I say to her?
Most Helpful Girl
Losing someone is of course difficult. The best and only thing, really, you can do for her is to be there for her and support her in anyway that you can. Let her talk out her fears with you, let her cry it out, let her be upset, let her grieve. It's hard for you because you've seen it before and you don't want her to keep hurting, but sometimes you need to just let a person go through it. You may get over difficult things at a faster rate then she does, but she isn't you and needs that time. It sucks and I feel for you being in that situation, but grief is a process, not a race. If anything, perhaps offer to go to or send her to a counselor who specifically deals with grief. That may give her another outlet for her to release all that's inside her right now. Good luck to you.0
Most Helpful Guy
Now I don't say this to offend or be mean, please understand that. But 9 years in a relationship with this woman and you don't know what to do when she cries?
But every girl is different in what helps! It's about personal touch here, which is the only reason I said the stuff up top. Outside doing the generic things to stop anyone from crying, like hug them, let them know you're there do them, rub there back, offer a handkerchief.
Ask yourself these questions:
What makes her happy?
What does she get joy doing?
What's her Favorite tv show?
what does she love to eat?
Is she big into animals?
It's got to be a personal touch that will help her here. Of course be understanding of her paranoia of death, as we all deal with it differently. Of course be there for her and offer help where you an and she allows during this depressing time for her.
Good luck sir I hope things get better for you both.1