I'm falling for my boyfriends friend and don't know what to do?

I've been with my boyfriend for 3 years now. Things were great for the first year and a half but they have been slowly getting worse. We have lived together for two years and have found ourselves acting more like housemates than in a relationship.

Anyway, he often has friends over and I get along with them really well but I think I'm slowly falling in love with one. When we first met I felt an instant attraction and after talking realised we have a lot of common interests (something I've always struggled accepting in my current boyfriend). Every time he comes over we laugh together and whenever I catch his gaze I know he feels the same connection.

We all went to a wedding this past week and I noticed him and I were standing together the whole time while my boyfriend barely noticed me.

I really don't know what to do. I am so loyal but My boyfriend and I are clearly unhappy and I feel like the worst human being only getting butterflies when I hear his friends voice.

A guys opinion would be amazing. It's not like I would break up with my boyfriend and date his friend but would there ever be a chance even 5..10 years down the track?

Thank you


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Most Helpful Guy

  • If you are clearly NOT happy with your current boyfriend, and you have this magnetic attraction towards his friend, then the BEST thing to do, would be to break up with your boyfriend. Once you are done with this, you can try dating his friend, IF he is fine with it. Because a lot of guys refuse to date their friend's ex due to some 'bro code' or something (which I'm not really aware of).

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What Guys Said 2

  • You should leave your boyfriend, or try to make it work. Don't just stay there because it's comfortable.

    After a few months ask the friend if he would want to date you, if he says he would, then ask hi to get the approval of your current boyfriend, and take it from there. It won't be as insulting coming from him.

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    • We have been trying to make it work for a long time. It gets to a point though when you're the only one trying and it gets exhausting!
      I've taken it as he doesn't want to try so I'm not going to force him anymore. It sounds bad but we have to stick it out until our rental lease runs out in 4 months.

    • You already act like roommates, why not make it official?

  • it's ok. ur young and it happens

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What Girls Said 2

  • That's normal. Your boyfriend's friend is just a test for you. You will meet more test like that in the future. Imagine you break up and live without your boyfriend forever. You gonna miss him very much

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  • Because you're unhappy with your boyfriend everything with your boyfriend's friend seems soo perfect and easy but the truth is that it's just an illusion. You haven't even been in a relationship with him so you haven't even experienced relationship challenges with him (fighting, arguing, insecurities) so ofcourse everything seems perfect. Why would you want to leave a relationship with someone that you've been with for 3 years for something that isn't even real? Once you leave your boyfriend and get together with his friend, you will realise that the grass actually isn't greener on the other side and you will experience the same problem with him after a while.

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