How to stop being paranoid that he's going to cheat?

Recently I asked a question if my lond distance crush liked me. Turns out he did because he asked me out last night. I said yes. Now, as before in all my relationships i have been cheated on either from the start or gradually into it. I am very scared that he will cheat too and even though he keeps telling me he won't and that i am the only girl for him, I still panic. It's only natural right? My question is how to stop panicking that he will cheat? I have a feeling that he's different because he's serious about us. He wants me to meet his mum, he wants us to get married and keeps saying how we're going to meet and how its gonna go. I feel like if I carry on being paranoid it'll ruin that what we have. At the moment he is very calm with me and keeps telling me that i'm the only one but part of me keeps thinking he's gonna cheat. How can I stop that feeling from ruining our relationship and how to stop feeling this way.. I'm also partly paranoid because he is very attractive and i'm just average looking. He keeps calling me beauiful when i'm not. I'll see if i can provide links in the comments

I can't post links... Which sucks :(


What Guys Said 1

  • "Once bitten, twice shy".

    I personally believe that you're not at fault AT ALL for your paranoia. That's one of the most natural responses around to be honest.

    The responsibility for deleting this paranoia is not yours alone. It's both of yours. Relationships go both ways. There needs to be give and take on both sides, or it doesn't work. He needs to earn your trust if he wants it to go on, but you need to learn how to trust him again. It's not going to be easy - not after what's happened to you - but if you really want it, you'll be able to do it.

    My first recommendation? Tell him how you feel. Tell him just what you've said to us. Don't sugar-coat it. Don't lie, don't avoid anything. Just start an open communication. Tell him what you need from him. Tell him what YOU'RE willing to do to help yourself. Ask questions. Answer them. Talking about problems never, EVER, makes them bigger. Unless your problem is literally talking about problems to much...

    I don't know how much this little message will help, but I hope it makes some sense. Being hurt is never fun, but wounds heal with time and TLC. Keep us posted on how it goes. I'm sure it'll be better this time.


    • Thank you for taking the time to read this. That did help also. I have asked him if we can chat tonight so I can tell him.. Ask him for us to help eachother. I will kept you posted on what happens. Thank you x

    • Good luck. I believe in you!

What Girls Said 1

  • You have openly Admitted to be in a LDR which is a good reason of your own Suspecting season to Be... Paranoid.
    I still have a husband that I married out in Egypt a few years back, and although I have not been 'Back,' I never really mistrusted him because I know the Kind of loyal and dedicated Muslim man tha the is.
    I believe the longer you know your love, the more you will Know him as a man. And with all the compliments tha the is giving you, in time, you will feel more secure that you are the one.
    Don't press or pressure him with anything out of turn. Let it go, let it flow, and remember, everything, every thought, is in God's hands.
    Nurse and nurture this special relationship and one day, it may pay off your way.
    Good luck. xx

    • Thank you for the upvote.:)) xxoo

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    • Thank you again :) I have contacted my local GP about my issues and they have passed me onto CAMHS but they haven't contacted me and that was about 2 months ago. I keep contacting them and have no luck. I am trusting him as best as I can :) xx

    • So welcome... Give them another call, sometimes One hand doesn't know what the other hand is doing in this industry... Yes, I trust you will do your very best, you have gotten this far thus far. xxoo